Strings In My Veins ( Puppeteer x Reader )

Chapter eighteen

I don't have an excuse why I was gone, but if you see in the description, this book is just for fun and updates come whenever. I'll post more though, I promise, I have a lot of new ideas.

11.30.18// School

What life would you have if Jonathan wasn't in your life?
Me, well...I'm more depressed then ever. I have all of my memories from my past life and sometimes it gets confusing. That's why everyone thinks I'm weird, that I'm some freak.  Here, it's a pain just getting out of bed because I know that every time I open my eyes I don't deserve it. I keep on thinking of Zachary. He's still trapped there and Emra and I shouldn't have even left at all if Zachary wasn't going...no. He possibly have died while saving our lives, but I still miss him.

I passed by Finn, who never raped me in this reality, who never damaged me. Even so, I create distance between us. He tried to talk to me multiple times and every time I give him a half assed answer. I know that he's "in love" with me, but people in love don't rape. That's not okay. He was...obsessed, maybe. I don't ever want to be associated with him even though I still care for him. Nobody will understand. Society thinks they know all about victims of rape, but they don't know shit. They will criticize if you still care for them, but I guess ignorance is bliss. I wish it was that easy for me. The Finn from my original reality was obviously moved to the realm of death. Even though I know that  it hasn't hit me yet.
"Fatass," a girl mumbled, shoving me with her friends snickering by her side. I clenched my fists.

"Why does size even matter?" I called after her. Teresa García; the girl who was hospitalized with anorexia three years ago. Teresa still glorifies eating disorders even after repeatedly stating that she "has a change of heart". I know she's still hurting with her self-esteem, but it's no excuse to treat others like shit.

"It's not about that, you're such a sensitive whore. I'm just saying that you ought to lose a few dozen pounds, I'm looking out for your health. You're welcome, cow," She sneered at me.

"You look good after recovery," I say to her. She approached me with a glare and slapped me, sending me pushed against a locker. I gasped as I held my burning cheek, begging myself not to cry. She was forced to gain 30 pounds and is weighed every day by the nurse.

"Fuck you, Y/N," Teresa says, her voice quivering. I then felt her ice coffee being spilled down my shirt, making me gasp. No one really cared, not even teachers who pretended they didn't see shit.
I slowly got up and shoved by her to go to the bathroom. I didn't even care if there were people in there. My vision was blurry from my tears and I tried to get the stain off my shirt but it was no use. I groaned as I took off my shirt to reveal my very see-through tank top, showing my black bra which is actually a little bit fashionable if I weren't crying messily. I'm not even crying about Teresa, I'm crying about everything. I'm crying about my deadbeat mom, I'm crying about Jonathan and the trauma that happened, I'm crying about my weight, I'm crying about both realities and it's messing with my mind.

"Hey...do you want to wear my jacket? You look like you're having a rough morning," a boy said behind me. I paused and I immediately stepped back, out of instinct, and my heart raced. It was Issac. Finns best friend in the past reality. He's the first person I saw die from Jonathan's doing. He still had his light pink hair and tan skin. His blue eyes stared into mine, making me shiver. I haven't felt this since...Finn.

"Why are you in the girl's bathroom? What are you some kind of perv?" I glared, stepping back. He chuckled.

"Actually, you're in the guy's bathroom," he says making me go white. I looked past him and noticed the urinals and I gagged. This is so embarrassing.

"O-oh!" I say, covering my eyes as I bindingly try to find the door. I heard him laugh as he helped me out. People stared at us as we exited the bathroom. He quickly gave me his jacket as the bell rung, disappearing into the crowd. I spun around, searching for him but it was no use. His black jacket smelled amazing and it made me feel safe. I can't help but wonder if he's still friends with Finn.
I entered my homeroom and sat in a random seat. I looked down and my heart stopped. I was sitting in Jonathan's seat. I don't know what to think about Jonathan, in a fucked way I...miss him. What we had may just be my deception so I could escape, but I know what his feelings were towards me. What he wanted to do to me.

I carved my pencil into the desk and wrote, "are you still here?"
I didn't expect anything to happen, I mean he's gone, right?