When Love Returns | 2 ✔

Chapter 6

"You're back! Hope they got into their vehicles safely?" Dad enquired the moment I stepped into the kitchen. They all held glasses of wine and I couldn't help but think they were making a toast to beguiling me. That was enough to wind me up.

"How'd I know? I left them just at the doorstep." I snapped. Snapping was becoming a regular occurrence for me. I ought to be worried but now wasn't the time.

"What's wrong darling? Do you feel tired?" Asked mum. Sure enough, she couldn't see through my words to realize I was pissed. That irked me more.

"Why did you decide not to bring up Jason during the celebration today?"  I asked no one in particular but at the same time, all of them.

"Honey, we wanted-" Dad tried explaining.

"Don't you dare call me Honey! You don't go about hurting my emotions and think you can sweet talk me to accept your words." I screamed with a fervency which made Dan shriek in terror. On normal circumstances, I would laugh and ridicule him for making an unmanly cry. But the time for that had gone.

"Why would you do this to me? I fought hard to smile for you all irrespective of the pain I felt but you had to feign happiness and swept all thoughts of Jason away. Why?"

Don't cry Cassie, don't cry!

However, my heart and eyes had an entirely different plan as tears glistened and poured down my cheeks.

"That was the whole point! We wanted you to smile and be happy even for a moment. Can't you see how the thought of losing Jason makes you feel? I brought up the idea that if we all never brought up Jason, you would cheer up. You can see now Cassiopeia, you have your sight back! That alone is enough to make you exhilarated." Mum answered with a sigh, "I should be the one to take all the blame for arranging every detail and ordering everyone not to mention anything related to him. I'm sorry" She added.

"No, I should be the one to take the blame. Cassie, I love you very much but you've been broken ever since you heard the devastating news of Jason's demise. Don't think I haven't noticed the way you wallowed in misery at the hospital and even on the way home." Dad stated. I was astonished, I thought no one heard me while I cried silently in the SUV while returning home. Apart from Ana, they seemed oblivious to it. I guess my quiet skills sucked!

"So blame me, not your mother." Dad suggested.

"Blame me also. Cassie, I concurred because I wanted to see your old bubbly and carefree self back." Ana also said. Her eyes were brimming with unshed tears.

"Blame me!" Phillip chipped in.

"Blame me too." Said Dan.

"And me too." Tess added.

I looked at all of them all trying to take the blame and supporting one another. I was on the brink of forgiving them but I just couldn't. They had no say over my life. I should have made the decision of erasing Jason not them. Wiping the tears off with my top, I motioned to Tess,

"I can't believe you were in on this as well. He was your brother for God's sake! You should have been there to tell them ‘No’. Instead you went ahead with the crazy plan. I'm just so disappointed in you!"

To the rest, I said,

"I'm going to my room and I don't want to see anyone of you. I'm gonna say this once ‘Stay the hell away from me.’"  Feeling triumphant, I ran of the kitchen, up the stairs and into my room where a fresh batch of tears were waiting to be shed.

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I hadn't eaten for three days now. My parents came into my room on the first day to apologize but their pleas fell on deaf ears. After that day, I locked my myself so they wouldn't be able to disturb me anymore. In here, I tossed and turned on my bed all night long.

Oh sleep, where are you?

I owed my lack of sleep to the memories in here. Each time I turned, something caught my attention to a deep memory Jason an I shared in this room. My room was incredibly large, capable of accommodating three more roommates comfortably. It was just a plain white and black room but very clean and beautiful. I was in awe of it. A large desk with my computer and braille books was located at a corner close to the similarly large glass windows—two windows to be exact—the blinds kept the sunlight from penetrating. The air conditioner, substituted the fresh air, wafting humidity. Still a tested and trusted fact, my bed was the softest, most comfy bed in the world. Just lay on it and you'd be in dreamland within minutes.

But why couldn't I sleep?

Apart from unremitting cries, there were moments I sat down, staring into space and thinking about one thing. Better yet, one man. How was I supposed to move on from this? He was my first crush, my first kiss, my first Love, he made me happy and even with the least gestures, he comforted and motivated me when I looked down on myself.

I just didn't know how to move on. Perhaps if it had been a different case whereby we broke up and then he met someone else, I'd be glad and moving on would be easier. Death certainly took the most precious of my possessions—not saying the rest of my family and Tess weren't precious to me, but Jason was my everything—there was no way to cope.

Yesterday, after I made the decision of locking myself in, mum knocked at regular intervals to place a tray of food at my door step. Initially, I opted on not eating but she kept removing and placing more. The ambrosia floated around my room making my stomach rumble. My ego got the better part of me and I deliberately, scratch that, fought hard ignoring it.

However, on the third day, Lord knows I couldn't resist. So after I heard the clinking sound of the tray and retreating footfalls, I hurried out of the room and grabbed the tray and then stepped back in. This time, I didn't lock the door. I gorged myself; never had pancakes, blueberry syrup and hot chocolate felt satisfying. I had to fill up on the days I hadn't eaten.

Food was heavenly!

Finally downing the glass of water, my heart heaved in contentment. Surprising myself, I let out a belch which was louder than usual. At least mum wasn't here to groom me on table manners.

To my mortification, I heard a chuckle. My head spun one eighty degrees and eventually landed on the source of the laugh.

"What are you doing here? Last time I checked, I told you to stay away from me." I fumed at the intruder.

Who do you think it is?

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I love you loads,
Osaro.