When Love Returns | 2 ✔

Chapter 18

Dear Jason,

It's my second letter to you and I feel much better and refreshed than the last. Writing to you has helped me realize that I would never stop loving you. There's this connection I feel although I know you'd never write back, somehow, I just feel you are alive, reading this!

Okay, that was weird but it's the truth!

Anyways, moving on hasn't been easy, however, everyone has made it less terrifying and more welcoming for me. I know you'd be proud to hear that I know how to pick out clothes and dress myself up now, it used to be Ana's job but I'm glad I can finally do it myself. I can even make myself up as well. I know you prefer natural beauty but it's every woman's dream to know a thing or two about makeup.

Guess what? I'm also quite capable of wearing high heels now. Ana—my nagging but sweet cousin—taught me. Recently, it's been the only thing I wear out but when I'm at home, I exchange them for fluffy flip-flops.

Oh! I can cook too! Isn't that amazing? Before you get excited, know that it's just basic dishes like pancakes, omelettes, noodles, spaghetti, and I can also make doughnuts and cinnamon rolls. I plan on learning how to make my favorite strawberry cheesecake soon.

Ana created a couple of accounts for me on social media. I haven't brought myself to check them out though. She said I have over two thousand followers on Instagram but failed to tell me the viral video that's gotten me the attention of people all over the world.

Moreover, keeping fit and living a healthy life is the most essential part of my life. Everyone morning, I head to our gym to burn off excess calories and stay in shape. The treadmill remains my best sporting equipment, others are hell! To be honest, physical fitness is amazing but there are so many times I crave all sorts of junk food. It happens all the time but heck, I still jump straight into the gym every morning and then the calories become history.

By the way, dad told me he'd informed the University about my health which resulted in me getting a full year off school to discover myself and getting accustomed to the perks of seeing. In the meantime, I'd be taught how to read and write properly, learn mathematics... Ugh! Understand literature, identify objects and all other important subjects.

Furthermore, I'm in good terms with everyone now—Did I mention I had a little disagreement with my family, including Charles, George, Samantha, Valerie and your sister, Tess?—So we've all be spending time with one another, going to the mall, the cinema, picnics at the beach, church and Sweet Love restaurant (They make the best strawberry milkshakes there). We have sleep overs almost every weekend. I mean I enjoyed every moment spent with my girlfriends. We have movie marathons where I finally got to see those famous actors the girls adored. Every time, they argued on who was more handsome and sexy; Noah Centineo versus Jacob Elordi, then One Direction versus Five seconds of Summer, The Jonas Brothers, The Hemsworth brothers and so on. I couldn't count the number of times I shook my head in disapproval.
They argued like their lives depended on it. I believed each guy had a peculiar beauty that shouldn't be argued over. But that was my opinion not the girls.

With all these however, there are still moments I feel so alone. It's been great to smile and hang out with family and friends but I still get this terrible feeling of loss. Times I feel choked, depressed and tired of life.

Times like when I remember your funeral is in three days!

Moments like this make me remember that you're never coming back! It would be the hardest day of my life when I'd see you laid down six feet underground. I can't bear letting you go for good.

Please come back!

Please!

I can't lose you!

I can't stand not hearing your voice again forever.

I can't stand not getting rides to and from school with you!

I can't stand not being able to tell you how I feel, my thoughts at the moment and hearing you whisper words of encouragement to me.

I can't stand losing you!

This is just too much for me! The pain is indescribable.

I don't want you to end up being just a memory.

Please come back!

PS. You remain the most handsome man I've ever seen. These celebrities could never be compared to you!

PPS. I still love you,

Cassiopeia.