You're So Perfect (MARKSON)

2

Mark

"Wake up Mark its time for school."

I hear my mom say as she shakes me lightly. It's not like I get sleep anyway. I don't even remember the last time I got some good sleep. Oh yeah... that one night when Charisma came over for dinner and ended up sleeping over. I remember holding her close as she breathed so softly in her sleep. The smell of her hair...her soft skin...her eyes when she looked at me.

Before I realized it, I was crying. I didn't even know my mom left my room so I kept on crying until I couldn't cry anymore. I finally got up and took a shower to wash away my pain, but it really didn't help. Mondays are always the worst for me. After sleeping in and being alone on the weekend, then to the place full of people who want to talk to me or ask questions like why I stopped talking or why am I so antisocial. Stuff like that. I hated it all. I dressed in a tshirt and jeans and made my way towards the door to see my mom already waiting for me. She drove me to school every morning since the Charisma thing because of my fear of being in the car like that. There have been plenty of times where I have had an flashback while driving and almost crashed the car.

I still remember the night to every detail.

Flashback to sometime last year

"Mark come on~ Let's go on a driiiive." Charisma says while pouring another cup of alcohol and swallowing it faster than she poured it. I was drunk too but I was sober enough to know what I was doing. "No baby let's just stay here okay?" I said while wrapping my arms around her waist, pulling her in for a kiss while she giggled wildly. "Please Marky~" She said while pouting in the most cutest way, making me give in. "Fine." I say while giving her a quick peck on the lips. We make our way to the car and she gets in the drivers seat and I follow behind.

"Uh what are you doing? I think I should drive...it'll be safer."

"Nooo baby it's fine. I'm good soooo good. I want to take you some where special okaaay? You trust me right?"

I sighed and got in the passenger seat. We drove a few miles when I noticed a familiar place, a spot near a lake where we had our first date. "Aw Charisma, I love you."

"I love you t-" She says while looking over towards me while not paying any attention to the road.

"Charisma watch out!" I screamed and she leaned over to kiss me and her foot pressed hard on the gas pedal. All of a sudden the car jerked and turned and I heard a crash and a scream.

I touched my head and it was wet. The faint street light shone a bit and I saw the glimmer of my blood. "Charisma are you okay?" I ask while trying to look over her way. I heard her make a small noise then I blacked out.

I woke up in a hospital bed with my mom and dad on both sides staring at me. My mom had tissues in her hand and her eyes were puffy. "Thank god you're okay." She said while sniffling. "W-where's Charisma?" I said but my throat was dry and raspy. "Go to sleep son. You need rest." I heard my dad say and I closed my eyes and drifted back to sleep. I woke up the next day and they told me she never woke up and I cried and cried. 

After her death, her family moved somewhere far and didn't tell us where. They blamed me for her death. I wasn't mad at them because I knew it was true. Ever since then I haven't touched any alcohol of any kind. I've always hated myself since then and I just wish I could hold her one more time. She didn't even get to finish telling me she loved me...

End flashback

"Mark? Mark? Maaark?" My moms voice echos as I snap back to reality. 

"Are you okay?" she asks and I look around and notice where we were...in front of my school.

I nod and say my bye's and I love you's and get out the car.

 "Oh Mark wait! Here's some extra money for lunch. You might want something else." She says while smiling and handing me money.

Something about today doesn't seem right. I don't know if its a good or bad thing but I'll be ready to find out soon.

▲▲▲

I head to first block and find an empty seat in the back and put my books on my desk. All of my grades are good so it doesn't matter what I do, they would still be above average. I pull out my Ipod and put my earbuds in and play the first song I see. I start to cry when the song starts playing.

I know you're somewhere out there

somewhere far away

I want you back

I want you back

my neighbors think I'm crazy

but they don't understand

you're all I have

you're all I have

Before I know it, I slowly begin to fall asleep while wiping my tears away.

Few hours later...

It's lunch time and I am honestly so sick of school food, so I walk to the McDonalds near the school. I order some food and sit at a table near the window so I could look outside at the passing cars. Eventually more and more people start entering and it's almost full. I start looking around and viewing the faces when I noticed a guy ordering food.

"That'll be $4.37." The cashier said to him and he started searching his pockets.

  I don't know what came over me but I felt the need to help the guy.  

"I got it." I say and hand over a five dollar bill.

 He turns around to say thanks and stares at me for a while and seems to have trouble speaking.

"Ahem." I clear my throat and he continues to stare at me.

"Oh um yeah thanks..." He says while turning around quickly and grabbing his food and leaving just as fast.

Well you're welcome. I thought to myself and went back to my table and stare out of the window.

Couples pass by holding hands and hugging and kissing and all that. It makes me sick to my stomach. I notice a girl on the other side of the street who looks just like Charisma. I blink my eyes and she was gone. Just like the night she died.

I hear a lot chairs moving because people were leaving to go back to class but I decided to stay a bit longer and look out of the window...wondering what am I going to do without her.