My Old Self ~ Jerika

16.

Skip to Christmas break, five days before Christmas. Erika is back at her house since Jake left to go his grandparents for Christmas. Erika hasn't said anything more to her mom than "hi" and has been locking herself in her room. Cortney's been busy doing who knows what. And Erika's grandparents are visiting soon.

Angel: Erika. Erika!

I sit at my desk and finish off my makeup. I grab my phone and pull my legs up to my chest on the chair. I start to text Jake back, ignoring my mom, when there's a few knocks on my door.

Angel: Come on! It's five days till Christmas and your grandparents are on their way here.

I roll my eyes and keep texting. But, of course, she doesn't give up.

Angel: Erika! I'm not taking your bullshit anymore!
Erika: Watch yo profanity!
Angel: Open this fucking door!
Erika: Open this fucking door.

I mimic her under my breath and go to the door, tucking my phone in my sweatpants' pocket. I open the door a little bit and my mom stands there in her apron.

Erika: See you're actually cooking for once.
Angel: Very funny. Now listen up, you behave while your grandparents are here. Be polite to everyone, including me. I don't want any attitude, for god sakes it's almost Christmas.
Erika: You know what would be great? If you listened for once. That, that would be great.

I start to close my door as she pushes it open. I don't fight her and back up, crossing my arms.

Angel: I am your mother, you obey me.
Erika: I'm 18 mom, a fucking adult. Those kids running around the house for days is my job.
Angel: You still live under my roof.
Erika: It's not really a choice. I have to wait until Jake gets back.
Angel: Oh Jake. You're lucky I haven't told Cortney.
Erika: I'm not lucky, I just knew you couldn't bring yourself to it. Try to ruin my only true friendship I've had ever since we moved here.
Angel: You're going behind her back. If anything Cortney will thank me.
Erika: Cortney might thank you, but what will I do? I'm the only child you have left, yet you treat me like I'm nothing. Go for it, tell her. I don't give a single shit what you do or what she does. I'm done. I'm done trying to keep our family together. I'm done trying to have a mother daughter relationship. I'm done!

I walk past her, out the door, and down the stairs. I grab my coat while walking out the front door and pulling my phone out of my pocket. I go on a walk down to the woods and the creek. I sit on the cold dirt and watch the heels of my feet glide around the frozen water.

I text Jake the whole time. We already have each other birthday presents as I used a lot of my money from babysitting for his. I got him a new pair of shoes, that were more on the expensive side, and he got me a new phone. He talks about how he always wears the shoes I have him and how his family is still confused on how he got them.

I laugh while we talk, sometimes uncontrollably. I love it. The only person that ever tried to make me smile anymore does it so well. Cortney barely talks to me ever and she always looks tired. I get a few texts from my mom and ignore them all. Eventually Jake finds some time to FaceTime me.

Jake: The creek?
Erika: The creek.
Jake: I wish I could be there.
Erika: Yeah, me too.
Jake: Six more days and I'm home. Less than a week.

You can hear small voices screaming in the back and Jake looks back at the door. When he looks back at me he's smiling.

Jake: My little cousins. They're chasing each other. They're trying to have fun all day until Christmas because I told them that the days fly by when you're having fun.
Erika: I wish I had some baby cousins that were in my life.
Jake: I think those kids you babysat were enough for you to handle.
Erika: True.
Jake: You should get back home Rik. It's cold out, I don't want you out there too long.
Erika: I don't want to go back to the house. It sure doesn't feel like home.
Jake: You'll be fine. Have fun, it will make the days fly by. Soon enough you'll be back in my arms.
Erika: I'll see you soon.
Jake: Get home safe.