When The Fat Girl Gets Skinny ✔

Present 8

My fist crumpled yet another mysterious note signed M. Every first period on Monday I've gotten an anonymous note signed M with some compliment. Today was a cudos to my outift which was just a plain t-shirt and a pair of mom jeans. A bit more effort than I've put since school started. I can't figure out who or why, but the little self-esteem boost isn't too bad. It would be nice if the person would reveal themselves. I could use a friend.

I continued to gather my books from my locker, a piece of paper slipping out of my binder while putting it into by bag. I picked the photo up, my heart clenching at the faded picture of me and Erica. It was about seven years ago at a beach in Florida. We wore matching one piece swimsuits, large grins on our face as we looked into the camera. That was the first time Erica had ever seen the ocean in person. My parents had offered to take her with us on our family vacation, and I remember the way Erica's face lit up as she saw the deep blue sea. I smiled sadly.

I miss her.

Tucking the photo safely back into my binder, I closed my locker, inhaling sharply when I saw Rueben leaning on a locker next to mine.

"Jeez, you scared me," I exhaled, hugging my binder tighter.

He smiled sheepishly, "Sorry." He walked with me to my class like he always did, and pecked me on my lips as he headed to his class.

I sighed, missing his comfort as I came to face the girls locker room.

I never felt comfortable changing in front of others. Years of fat shaming has altered how I view myself and made me too concious of how others would view me which is why I'm changing in a cramped bathroom stall.

I may have lost weight, but I am not risking my mental health by changing in front of girls being plagued by society's definition of beauty.

P.E was my least favorite clas for obvious reasons. The laps were no joke. Running around the football field in the sun was exhausting. I haven't actually partaken in P:E class for at least a year and laps were just as unpleasant as I remember. I'm in a lot better shape than I was before, but something about running in this particular setting was triggering memories of a less ideal time.

"How can someone be that fat?"

"Eww, she has stretch marks on her arms."

"I would die if I looked like that."

I was happy when the session was over and hurriedly tried to make my way to the bathrooms to change back. "Hey, Maya. Aren't you going to shower?" A girl asked. I was hoping I'd discreetly slip away and smell like sweat for the rest of the day but I guess not.

I smiled tightly. "Yea. One sec." 

I turned back around, stepping into the locker room. The girls changed in front of each other easily enough. There was no malice or fowl play, but I still couldn't bring myself to strip down in front of them.

There are still traces of my obesity. The stretch marks decorated my arms, legs and abdomen and I wasn't ready to show them. But that's okay.

I walked out of the locker room, ignoring the curious stares of the girls as I passed, going to the bathroom to change like I've always done.

***

Even though there isn't any reason for it, I was exhausted. Thr house was empty when I got home so I poured myself a glass of water and pounged in the living room. I silently worked on my homework, hoping to be productive with my time until I retired to a book later.

Surprisingly enough, my homework wasn't as difficult or as tedious as I expected it to be. I was done at around six, so now I cozied in bed reading my novel.

The perfect way to end the day.

The vibration of my phone on the night stand caught my attention, but I didn't wanna be pulled out of my fiction daze, so I ignored it. A small sigh escaped me when it continued to vibarate.

From Rueben: Are you still going to the Halloween party this weekend?

From Rueben: Hello?? Maya????

From Rueben: please put your book down and answer me.

To Rueben: OMG! Yes, I'm going. I thought we decided this already? also, you're annoying.

From Rueben: We did, but I'm just checking that you haven't changed your mind. Can I come over?

To Rueben: No.

From Rueben: rude. I'll be over tomorrow morning to pick you up.

I rolled my eyes, but I wasn't actually annoyed. I sent a quick reply, and continued my book.

***

Omg! This update took forever! I've had a crazy couple weeks but here I am now.

The next chapter might be triggering for some readers so please be warned.

Please make me smile by clicking the star and maybe leaving a comment ;)