seanathan leward imagines:)

imagine 25; still love

Your POV:

I guess some things never change.

Sometimes i sit and think about what life would be like if i was still with him.

Sean was the love of my life.

He is the one guy that was actually worth a broken heart.

I always thought he was the one person I'd always love. And he still is. It's just different now.

Let me fill you in.

As of today it's been about 13 months since Sean and i broke up.

Him and i used to be inseparable. We would go on dates everyday. He used to post about us. He would tell me he wanted to marry me.

It was the world against us.

We were head over heels in love.

Then after a year of dating and amazing memories he suddenly called me and told me we needed to talk.

Of course my heart was crushed when he called and it got worse as he ended up at my house.

I remember everything he had said to me as if it was yesterday.

*flashback*

"Listen y/n. I don't know how to say this. Well i do but i don't wanna hurt you. This has been killing me and i need to get it off my chest.  When i first met you i fell in love. And even now I'm in love with you. I just think my career is more important than what we have. I love you. Truly. It's just that i need to focus on myself. Being in love is underrated. When i fell in love with you i didn't know how much my life would change. And i didn't know it would become such a distraction. I love you but this needs to end. I will never stop being in love with you. But i have to leave you. Okay? I hope you find it in your heart to not hate me. I want to be able to find you again. But not now. So as of now we are just friends. I'll see you in tomorrow's class. If your still coming. I'm so sorry."

He said it as if it wasn't a big deal.

I was completely and utterly shocked as if it was a dream. "So this is done?" I asked as i looked away from him.

He raised my face painfully as my eyes still wouldn't looked at him.

It was too embarrassing at the time to even think of looking at him.

He sighed. "For now it is. You will always be my love bug. And I'll always be your lover boy. Just like we always say. But for now we need to split ways. I will never fall out of my love for you. And i will come back again. And i hope when i do you'll forgive me." He explained.

I hated that he used our nicknames.

It crushed me because i knew it was the last time I'd be able to say that to him. And i knew it was the last time he'd say that to me.

"Go home Sean. I love you but i don't wanna feel you staring at me when this breaks me." I told him quietly as a single tear strolled down my face.

He cried too. More than i was actually. But it was because he felt guilty. "I'm so sorry y/n." He told me.

"Get out Sean. Please." I stated looking down.

He wiped a single tear away and made me look at him.

He kissed me slowly as i tasted his tears.

And as our final kiss ended, he stood up walked through the door, and left me sitting on my living room couch more broken then I've ever felt.

*end of flashback*

Still to this day i don't know why he left. I didn't want him to. I wanted him to fight for it. And fight for us.