i. rumors

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"Suffering has been stronger than all other teachings and has taught me to understand what your heart used to be. I have been bent and broken, but - I hope - into a better shape."
― Charles Dickens, Great Expectations







It had only been about 10 seconds of being on the school grounds and I was ready to burn the school down.

A million thoughts were buzzing through my mind as I tried to hide from the unashamed stares while walking towards the Institute of hell. I tried to picture something - anything - that would bring me some sense of comfort. Nothing did.

Usually, before the new year at school begins, my mom and dad would hold an intervention where they'd offer a rare piece of good parental advice and calming words of support. It was tradition. The infamous back-to-school-Stryder-parent speech.

This year was different. With mom gone... I was left with Dad's awkward rambling.

"Sophomore," Dad said, "uhh... old enough to be placed with real responsibility but young enough to never be taken seriously. Isn't that sad."

It was the worst back-to-school advice to date but I smiled at him and hugged him. I knew how hard it was for him, how hard it was for us all. Mom left and Dad was really trying his best to fill the void. I loved him for it but nothing could fill the void mom left.

Summer Break should've been full of the usual Tuesday dinners with the Blossoms, adventures with Lyra, Richie and Reg, endless binge-watching of trash tv with the gang, swimming, parties and the buzz of Fourth of July fireworks. Summer Break was always something I looked forward to, I should've had the time of my life. But the break could not have been any worse.

There were no dinner parties, mom left town with no explanation, the rumours went from crazy to insane, my family reputation was officially tarnished for good, we were literally exiled as one of the Riverdale elites, I found a new neat habit of having an anxiety attack every second minute and to top it all off... Jason died.

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