Cristina

Chapter 17

The training is over, and we are back home. Cristina and I fall into a routine. Almost every evening she is at my house. Most nights, she just stays over.
I can feel myself falling for this woman, and what my mom has said to me is eating at my conscience. I keep wanting to talk about it with her, but she has already told me her story. I know that she has made a promise to her father, but will she live the rest of her life that way? We are always together. The only time that we are apart is at work. We try to remain professional at work.

It is Friday night, and for once, I am over at her house. Her husband is on a trip like he always seems to be. We are making cookies in her kitchen. We just got done making love, and we both attest to feeling hungry.

She is in just a t-shirt and an apron. There is no female sexier than her on planet Earth. She is just putting the cookie mix on a baking sheet when I push up against her. I spin her around and claim her lips. My hands are moving just as fast, running up her legs.

She wiggles and says, "Emma, stop it. Let's get done with these."

I grip her ass in my hands and spank her left cheek.

"Why are you complaining? You love me this way."

She blurts out, "yes, I do."

I back away from her, and she is stuttering, "you know, uhm...I didn't mean...you know what I mean."

I am smiling so wide. Does she really love me? I am aware I love her a while ago, but I don't want to say anything to scare her off.

"Why don't you say it again?"

She blushes. Seriously, I would think she would be over this blushing phase by now. There is nothing I haven't done to this woman already. There is no way I haven't had her already. Why does she still blush so much?!

She says under her breath, "I love you."

I pretend not to hear anything.

"What did you say?"

She looks at me so seriously and says it loud enough this time, "I love you, Emma."

I pull her to me and kiss her lips.

"I love you too, Cristina."

If it's even possible, we just fall into an even happier place. We continue with our cookies and have two each as we go to the couch to watch TV.

I so want to ask her about us. I really can't hold it. We watch for like twenty-five minutes, and I am so done with wondering.

I hold her hand and say, "Cristina, I need to ask you something."

She immediately turns to me on the couch, and I just let it out.

"I want you with me, as in only mine. I want us to share the same space. I want to know what we are. I want to know if we will ever be anything. Will I ever get to have you day in, day out, in our own home? I want some answers."

Instantly, tears are falling down her face. I feel bad that I'm making her cry, but I need to know. She just shakes her head, not saying one word to me as she releases my hands.

"What does that mean, Cristina?"

She barely gets out, "you know I can't, Emma."

I feel like someone just stuck a knife to my heart. I feel so mad and hurt in this moment.

"What I know is that you can't stand up to your father. What I know is that you are heartless. You fuck me almost every damn night in my bed, and you sit here and tell me you can't?"

I get up and run for the door. I don't want her to see the tears now falling down my cheeks. I can hear her crying and calling for me, but not once do I stop.

I make it home the quickest I ever have before. I cry myself to sleep. How can the best night also be the worst? She admits she loves me for the first time, but it's also the night I lose her.