a hell called home (completed)

everyday part 3

adam's pov

this is it... today's the day.

i walked into my geometry AC class to find Katy wasn't there. she was probably just sick. we carried on class as usual. after class while i was packing up, a group of kids came up to me.

"you going to see your boyfriend today?" one of them said mockingly.
"haha yeah, what a fucking loser. you should just fucking give up already."
"you're so pathetic falling for a boy that's comatose. go out like romeo and juliet and just fucking kill yourself. nobody would care anyway."

they stopped talking to me as soon as the teacher came back into the classroom. he said to have a good day, and everyone else started to pack up and talk. i imagined max holding my hand and telling me it will be alright and that he will beat the shit out of those kids for me. except... maybe he will never do that again...

as i approached the flagpole, the same group of kids came up. one boy punched me in the face without saying a word. i stumbled backwards onto the ground. a girl walked by and spat on me and kicked me in the dick. the group laughed.

"fucking pathetic."

the group disbanded as i sat there for a moment.
they're right. i am fucking pathetic.
i don't deserve to live.

i walked to the hospital, as per usual, thinking about max.
is he ever going to wake up?
is he going to die or be like this forever?
i walked into the lobby.
"hey adam!" misty said, looking away from the magazine she had. "you're a bit late today!"
"yeah," i said "i know."
"woah kid, what happened to your lip? it looks pretty busted up. if you want i can call someone to patch it up for you."
"no, it doesn't hurt. i'm fine."
it did hurt. everything hurt. there was an aching in my chest that wouldn't stop. some the scars running along my body were exposed when i fell. my face stung. everything hurt. it didn't matter though.
"okay. well- be right back."
misty left for a second and came back with some bandages, an ice pack, and some ointment.
"come back here."
i walked behind her desk. i've never been back there before up until now.
"what happened?" she said softly. she was disinfecting and cleaning up the cuts on my face.
"nothing."
she looked up from the scrapes for a moment and gave me the i ain't buying that bullshit face.
i sighed. "just some assholes."
she went back to working on my face.
"aaaand done. arms."
i hesitated.
"arms." she said sternly.
i rolled up my sleeves and wiped them down, then she slathered some of the disinfectant ointment on it and started to wrap them up.
i stuttered a bit "w-what? how did you know?"
"nobody wears long sleeves in 98 degree weather unless they're hiding something. besides, i'm a fucking nurse. what did you expect? i just couldn't help you because you didn't want my help. it's all voluntary."
she finished up with both arms and then handed me the ice pack.
"just... don't do it again." she sighed out.
i nodded. she handed me the ice pack.
"this is for your face. oh, and you should know that pauline and david are here today."
"alright. thank you, misty." i said as i started walking towards the elevator to get to max's room.

it should have been me.
he shouldn't be going through this.
it should have been me.
i don't deserve to live anyway.
she was just being nice. she's a nurse after all.
nobody cares.
that's why my parents gave me up.
that's why everyone i love dies.
they all hate me.
max hates me.

that thought hit me right where it hurts. i walked into the room to be greeted by pauline and david. pauline was grading some papers, and david was helping. i started to do the homework i didn't finish.

it's all useless.

we all sat in the room for hours, seeing if you would wake up. everyday. pauline has to go and feed her pets, which left david and i.

"listen, adam..." he started, not knowing how to finish. i could see it in his eyes.
"no..." i whispered.
david looked at me surprised.
"i haven't even said it yet-"
"the answer is no."
david looked at max then back at me. he closed his eyes, choking back tears. his voice cracked as he spoke. "we don't have a choice."
i could feel tears welling up in my eyes. no... no... i cant...i can't live without him.
"i'll... give you a second." david got out of the chair quietly and left the room. i heard him crying softly as he left.

i walked over to the bed and kneeled down by max's head.

"listen max... i... i need you to wake up for me. please, for the love of god. please, wake up. i don't... i don't know how much longer i can go on without you..." i chokes out a loud sob.
"please, just fucking wake up! everyday without you just fucking sucks. it should have been me. it should have been... listen max... we need you."

i started sobbing even harder and punched the wall.

if there is any god, you better fucking help him. please... oh god, please... i cant fucking do this anymore. i love him. i love him so much. please, help him.

i ran out of the room crying only to be caught by david. he hugged me as i slowly sunk to the floor. i incoherently said
"he's only fucking fourteen. why? WHY? i cant fucking live like this anymore. he has to wake up."
david couldn't hear a single word i was saying, but he understood. he hugged me tighter and started crying.
"come on... i'll drive you home." he said. i sat there silently. david held my hand as we walked to his car. i gave him directions to a friends house because i didn't have a home.
i was all alone.

it's been almost two years now...
max....
we need you.

1036 words

when you think about it, they're all just lost kids. they don't know what to do in this situation. keep max in life support in hopes he wakes up, or let him give up? the decision is life or death. david can't stand the idea of letting max suffer, but he can't let go. gwen hates the idea of not having him there anymore. mrs cooper only wants what is best for max.

adam just wants max to wake up.

they are all just kids who don't know what they're doing. max, fourteen. adam, fifteen. david, twenty four. gwen, twenty three. pauline, twenty seven. nikki, fourteen. neil, fourteen.

they're still kids.
they still have their whole lives ahead of them.
everything just changed with max.
will he ever wake up?
he has to.

t h e y n e e d h i m .