Save Me

Chapter 1: UNCONDITIONAL

*mature content*

It's really funny isn't it? Thinking that the people who are supposed to love you unconditionally are the ones to hurt you the most. Those people being your parents...your family.

I was 5 years old when I saw my dad put a gun towards my moms head as she yelled for me to run. Yet I was frozen in place as I saw the fear in her eyes and the cold determination he carried in his eyes to kill my mother. He gave me a smirk as he was ready to pull the trigger, tears running down her cheeks. You can see her fear wasn't to die, but to leave me here in this world alone with this cold hearted monster.

I didn't move when she yelled out again..no.

I stayed there as he held her from behind, hand on her neck as he towered over her with a look of intimidation. She fought hard to break free, tears running down her face along with yells until he threatened to kill me first then her.

"Please Henry please! Let her go inside please!"

He laughed a laugh that was filled with poison...almost demonic.

"I want her to see how little your life means to me. How much a whore like you doesn't deserve to live unless it's with me. You're not leaving me. She took all your attention from me! Now I'm going to take you back!"

The pure horror of my mothers eyes, were enough to stay in my mind forever. The look of the realization that she was going to die today was enough to keep me awake at night til' this day.

"I love you baby" was the last thing I heard come out of her mouth as a tear started to fall from my eye down my cheek.

He cocked the gun and that's when I snapped back to the reality that he was going to kill my mother.

"No, daddy!" I say as I run towards them.

He pulls the trigger, the bullet hitting my moms temple and blood splatters all over the floor and my face as she falls and hits the ground.

"MOMMY!"

He laughs as he stands over her. I run towards my mom.

"Mommy!" I shake her. "Mommy.." Tears run down my cheeks.

"Mommy please, please wake up! Don't leave me!"

"Your mommy never wanted you, WE never wanted you! I'll let you live just because this pain will stay with you forever knowing you caused her death you fucking useless parasite!"

I sob against my mothers body as I wince at his words that were filled with hate. My father, my superman...became the villain right before my eyes. The man who swore he'd protect me from pain just caused the first and deepest cut I have ever felt.

As I sobbed against my mothers body, I heard the gun being cocked again and I turn to look and see my father pointing the gun against the bottom of his jaw. He looked straight at me, eyes filled with hatred, laughed, and pulled the trigger.

Another parent dead in front of me.

At that moment, I didn't react. I didn't feel pain. I felt numb, I just stood there with both their blood splattered on my red and white dress, my favorite dress, as I heard police sirens at a distance coming closer and closer. I looked at my mom and I grabbed her favorite ruby ring she never took off and I held it in my hand. I stood there with no emotions as I waited to feel anything.

Everything happened in slow motion, the EMT's ran in along with police officers. A female officer kneeled down in front of me trying to grab my attention. She had her hair pulled back into a bun and wore her uniform. She was speaking to me with eyes of sympathy and worry, she waved her hands in front of my face waiting for me to react. But everything was a blur, I couldn't hear I couldn't move.

I just stood there.

When she finally realized I was not going to react, she stands up and scoops me into her arms. When I look around I see them put a sheet over my dead sperm donors body, the title of "father" disappearing the moment he pulled the trigger. Then I glance towards my mom, her eyes still open, the EMT has one knee up and the other against the ground as he sighs when he sees her. He reaches to close her eyes and with that I yell out as I realize I'm alone in this world. I begin to cry the most painful cries I have ever felt.

My chest felt as if though I was being burned from the inside out.

There was no escaping the endless hell that was my life at just 5 years old and as shocking as that is I was still able to realize this at my young age. The only thing that held any comfort for me at that moment was the officer holding me while I cried on her uniform, soaking it with my tears of despair. She rubbed my back, "you will get through this little one, I promise." I didn't believe her, I knew I wouldn't.

She sat me in the backseat of her police car and I continued to cry and yell,

"MOMMY!! MOMMY!! DON'T LEAVE ME MOMMY!"

I see the police officer look back at me, eyes misted as I continued to cry, she talked to another man in uniform and finally they both looked at me then each other and nodded. The man gave me a sympathetic look and the woman sat next me, pulling me into her chest to comfort me.

I kicked and I screamed against her and she never let go. I didn't want to be comforted by anyone other than my mom as I still held her ruby ring in my hand, I finally couldn't bare crying anymore as the pain in my chest grew unbearable. I laid in her arms and looked down at the ring as I drift into a slumber that was just the first of many to come filled with nightmares.