Personal Assistant: Limited Edition[MXM]✔

Chapter 40

40.

The call came two days later from a distraught Ross. I knew what he was going to say the moment I answered and all I could hear was him breathing. He couldn't say the words and I wholeheartedly wished I could protect him from the pain of their existence.

My heart settled in my stomach when I heard him sniff repeatedly. Knowing beforehand hadn't lessened his pain or mine. I wanted to hold him. I wanted him to reciprocate. I wanted our pain to merge so neither had to feel it more than the other, especially because I knew what I felt couldn't come close to what Ross was feeling.

He took sharp breaths and whimpered. There was more crying and sharp breaths intake. I didn't say anything. I thought of saying something, but it didn't feel right. Ross needed to cry. He didn't need me interrupting with words like "it's going to be okay." Maybe it would be okay, but it wasn't okay at that moment. Nothing would make it okay.

"H-he...he's...h-gone. Nasir's h-h-h-gone," I heard him saying.

I needed a doctor. I was certain my heart was shattered to pieces. My chest felt hollow and my stomach shut tight. I already knew what Ross was going to say, but having him say it finalized it. Death was final. It couldn't be reversed. Ross wouldn't joke about it.

Nasir was gone.

"I'm so sorry Ross," I said. It wasn't a lot but it was all I could really say.

"Will you come...will you come for the funeral?"

"Of course," I said quickly. "I can even come earlier to help you prepare."

He sniffed. "That's not necessary. The funeral is...it's tomorrow at ten in the morning. I'll give you directions to the cemetery. Everything..." he said and coughed. "Everything will be held there. Do you want to say something?"

"Uh..." I mumbled. I wasn't sure. What could I even say? I took a deep breath. "Yeah sure, I'd like to say something. I can still drive there tod-" I said and he cut in.

"It's really okay. K...Tim is helping. I'll put you on the program," he replied.

I couldn't even be mad at Tim anymore. He was doing what I should have been doing. At least he was doing it. Most people would have run at the thought of meeting someone just a few days before and having to help them plan a funeral and comfort them. Tim seemed like a nice guy.

"I'll be there tomorrow," I said.

"Thanks Sebastian."

When Ross hung up I cried. I cried so hard I developed a headache. I curled up in my bed and just let it all out. When my phone rang I thought it was Ross, but it wasn't.

I didn't feel like taking the call but I knew if I didn't my mother would be worried. I had to answer and pretend I was okay.

I toweled my cheeks with my hand as if she would see them and accepted the call.

"Sebastian, have you found a new mother?" mom's voice came on the other side.

I chuckled, and for a second my eyes landed on a small cardboard box on my nightstand. I'd placed the box there just before Ross's call. The box contained something I'd purchased online the night I'd told Nasir how I felt about Ross...hopefully. I hadn't opened it yet.

"I'm sorry I haven't been calling you mom," I said into the phone.

I was certain my voice was emotionless so she startled me when she said, "Honey what's wrong?" Her voice was overflowing with concern.

"Nothing's wrong mom," I said cheerfully.

I would never make it as a voice actor because my cheer got my mom even more worried.