My Love, My Saviour, My Student 2 • Shawn Mendes

4.

Faye Dawson
"I mean how could he?! He's such a fucker! He's a dick!" I yelled into the phone. "God Thomas you don't understand how hard it was to not slap him. I had to restrain myself. And he had the fucking nerve to touch me! He touched my scar! And asked what happened!"
"Shit Faye. Can't you transfer?"
"No! No. I'm proving to him that I'm fine without him. Because I am fine without him...right?" I asked even unsure of myself.
"You're fine without him. Look at all the amazing things you did in summer without him! You don't need him back. Unless you want him back."
"No. Well...no no I can't want him. I don't want to want him!" I yelled
"Ok fine you don't want him. Look I have to go Faye. You're strong. Show him that." Thomas said and I sighed.
"Ok. Love you Thomas"
"Love you too Dawson" he said before the line went dead.

He was right. I am strong. And I don't need him. He looked so so good but I couldn't allow myself to give in that easily. I threw my phone onto my abnormally large bed and ran my fingers through my hair. A shout from outside the window pulled me out of my capturing thoughts.
I walked over to see what was going on.
"Shawn!" A familiarly British voice yelled. I poked my head round to see what he was doing.
I saw Shawn in his lecture clothes carrying all his folders walking in the opposite direction to where I was. Tyler was running from our block to meet him. I opened the window a little so I could hear what was being said.
"Come on man you know you can't call me that" Shawn said with an obvious roll of his eyes.
"What are you doing for the rest of the day?" Tyler asked as if they were friends.
"Sitting at home" Shawn said bluntly.
"Why don't we hang out? I told you I met this really cool girl yesterday I can ask her to come it'll be fun!" Tyler said and my heart fell into my stomach as I knew he was talking about me.

No way was I hanging out with Shawn.

"Who is this girl you keep going on about?" Shawn asked and my heart thumped louder in my chest.
"She lives in room 20," Tyler said looking up and spotting me. I quickly diverted my gaze and fiddled around with the window to make it seem as if I was only just opening it. "Shit look she's there! Faye!" Tyler said and I inwardly groaned.
I looked back up at the two and tried to smile.
"Hey Tyler"
"Do you want to come hang out for a bit?" Tyler asked and I shook my head.
"Erm no that's ok. Thank you" I said.
"Aw come on. Come meet my friend Shawn!" He yelled and again I shook my head.
"No thank you!" I yelled walking away from the window, but as I walked away I heard Shawn's voice,
"Just leave her"

For some reason, this small comment send a rage through me. A rage so bad that I couldn't stop myself from walking back up to the window, sticking my head out and answering.
"Oh what like you left me?" I said without thinking, the anger clouding my vision.
The two men turned as I ran my fingers through my hair.
"What the hell?" Tyler said as Shawn looked guilty.
"Yeah what the hell shawn." I mimicked.
"Faye do we really have to do it like this?" Shawn asked and I scoffed. "Look why don't you just come back to mine and we'll talk"
I muttered a quick 'fine' before closing the window.

Grumpily yet determinedly I walked down the stairs flicking my hair from inside my jumper. I stopped behind the two men and gestured for them to start walking; which they did.
The whole ten minute walk was silent. Completely silent. I tried to plan how I would approach this, planning what I would say over and over in my head. The mix of nerves and anger made it almost impossible to decide what to say.
Shawn stopped us infront of a large brick house with white columns and a little porch. It was beautiful. Then again I knew Shawn wouldn't settle for anything less.
He fiddled with the keys in the lock before welcoming us both in. The inside was just as nice as the outside, the brick walls the open spaces.
"We can go to the attic. Do you guys want a drink?" Shawn asked.
"Tea, you know how I like it" I croaked quietly and he nodded sadly. Tyler declined and we stood around awkwardly as Shawn made two teas.

He handed mine to me in a pink mug similar to the one I loved at his house in England. I cleared my throat awkwardly as I took it. I had to tear my eyes away from him as we made our way up the stairs and into another open attack space. It had a wooden floor with big windows on one side, two large sofas an arm chair with a desk and a large tv and a fire place. It was beautiful.
"Take a seat" Shawn said and I sat at one end of one sofa with Tyler and Shawn sat on the sofa opposite.
"So were do we begin it seems like there's a hell of a lot to talk about" Tyler said and I shrugged sipping on my drink.
"Basically Shawn was my teacher back in high school and we started dating" I started and immediately Tyler's eyes went wide.
"You dated?!" He said and we both nodded.
"technically we still do" Shawn added and I shook my head.
"We don't." I said quickly and Shawn sighed. "You can't just expect to waltz back into a relationship with me after you never bothered to contact me. Not a single bloody word Shawn" I said and he nodded.
"I know I know it was a really big dick move. I thought you'd forget about me" he shrugged.
"Forget about you? I helped get you out of prison, and Shawn you fucking gave me ,basically, an engagement ring how the hell was I supposed to forget you!" I said raising my voice.
"You guys were engaged?!wait...you were in prison?!"
"Ok I feel like we need to tell you the whole story." I said and Shawn told him the whole story.

"This is crazy. That's crazy. Why the hell would you just leave her?" Tyler asked Shawn and Shawn covered his face with his hand.
"I don't know. To be honest I just wanted a change. A new start. You were travelling all over the world you didn't need me" Shawn said and I nodded.
"I didn't need you. But I wanted you, because I loved you Shawn. I loved you with all I had" I said feeling the emotions rise through me.
"I'm sorry I can't do this" I said feeling tears come from my eyes. I slowly stood up placing the mug down and walked back down the stairs hearing my name being called several times.