"You said you were ok..." ([Mainly]Depressed! David Oneshots)

T e n

This took too long for 512 words
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David hates being him. That's just the simple way to put it.

He's tired of being told how annoying he is.

He's tired of looking in the mirror and seeing what's starting right back.

He's tired of being shut down by others.

He's tired of having to be so oblivious.

He's tired of being that one person that everyone uses.

In general, he's tired of being himself.

He knows he's annoying.

He knows he's oblivious to things.

He knows that he's getting stepped on.

David knows that everyone's just using him.

David wished that he could speak up. Do anything that could remotely defend himself.

But he couldn't. No matter what way David tried, there was always a fault.

Every time he's told he's annoying,

Every time that someone shuts him down,

Every time he looks in the mirror,

Every time David's oblivious to something,

Every time David is used.

Every single time, he gets even more tired of himself.

So sick and tired, but that little sliver of hope in him that says, 'It's all going to get better soon.', pushes him through the days.

Weeks.

Months.

Years.

At this point, David's not exactly sure how he's even managing to get up in the morning. Let alone smile.

But something always comes back to him.

Something faint that just keeps urging and urging David to just look up.

That small fragile voice that is so close to shattering in the back of his mind was so close.

So close to shattering into a billion pieces.

David wished he could tell someone. He really did. But, he managed to convince himself that nobody would ever truly understand.

He was told, 12 years ago,  that the only person that could truly change the way he felt was himself. The words were spoken so carefully to David that he was positive they were true.

But they weren't a lie. They were defiantly not a lie.

But yet again, there was the doubt that David always had.

David never liked admiring that something was wrong. Let alone that he was drowning without the shore in sight.

If he were to say he needed somebody to be there for him, it wouldn't do anything. The only thing it would do for David is make him more aware of his feelings.

And he didn't want that.

David wanted to just be able to sell his mood.

Get rid of it for good.

Start over.

But once again, as the patten continues, he couldn't just start over.

He just had to build off of what he had.

Even if the shitty Camp Campbell was the only thing he truly had left to build off of.

David splashed water into his face from the facet (?) snapping him out of his thoughts. He slipped his camp shirt on, then tied the yellow shirt around his neck.

David downed 2 pills, then looked in the mirror.

'Just look up.' David told himself offering a small smile to the mirror. 'Keep smiling. Be happy. Just for the day.'