Untouched

The Truth (Un)told

To say that SeokJin was surprised to see Taehyung was an understatement. He had never given anyone his address. This was supposed to be a solo trip, One  that would him figure things out.

“Taehyung-ah! How did you find me?” was the first thing that came out of his mouth when he found a boxy smiled Taehyung at his hotel door.

“You can't get rid of me that easily hyung!” Tae replied as he made his way in.

Seokjin said nothing as he closed the door behind him. He kept looking down, as if he was ashamed of something.  

“Hyung! Tell me what is wrong” Tae pleads, he wants to know what drove Jin away.

“I don't want to share Tae, that's why I came here, I need to figure it out on my own” Jin replies.

“You should not burden yourself hyung, tell me what it is. You can still figure it out on your own, I  won't say anything, I will simply listen. Please share with me hyung” Tae said earnestly, hoping his eyes could express his true feelings, that he really truly only wanted what is good for Jin.

“Fine” SeokJin sits on the bed and lets out a sigh.

“I met Namjoon again” Tae's heart stopped at the mention of Jin's ex.

“We kissed you know, it could have been more, but I stopped him, he is engaged, It wouldn't been fair” Seokjin says, his voice is barely above whisper.

“And then before that Hyo-sang asked me to date him. That's Lisa's cousin I met at the wedding. We kissed too. But it didn’t feel right”

Taehyung's heart is being scattered in pieces, but he doesn't say anything, just nods and listens.

SeokJin sighs again. “Namjoon is engaged but he wants to get back together. I.. I don't wanna be a homewrecker, But I miss him so bad. and I kinda wanted him to go on, you know, even though I stopped him.”

He continues, “With Hyo-sang everything is great, we have great chemistry and similar interest. Our careers matches out each other as well. When we kissed, he didn't go further because he didn't want me to feel uncomfortable. Weird thing is, I kinda wanted him to go on as well, even though something didn't feel right.”

SeokJin let out a heavy breath.

“It's like I don't know what I want. No, actually I know what I want, but I can't have it, even though it's right in front of me” he was looking away from Tae, eyes locked towards the window.

Tae laughed dryly at his last words. how awfully ironic.

He too, can't have what he wants, even though it sits right in front of him.  

“So, what brings you here?” he asked Jin.

“I wanted some time alone to think” Jin let out a chuckle “It's stupid really, I concluded from my experience, my feeling were clouded by need, you know. I have been dry for so long, I would actually sleep with anyone at this point, I guess. So I thought I would be good to come here, throw my chastity belt, hoe around, get laid, get it outta my system so that I could think clearly again”

Tae could feel anger bubbling in his system.

“I haven't been able score so far. I guess I am out of the game for far too long. And now you are here, what do you say, wanna be my wingman?” he asked Taehyung casually with a smile.

Tae couldn't take it anymore. It had hit him hard that the love of his life was considering two potential partners and he was none of them. And now he was asking him to be his wingman??

Suddenly, He got on his feet and walked towards Jin. Within a blink of an eye, he placed his lips on Jin.

And he kissed him. He kissed him feverishly, kissed him with hunger, kissed him like the world would end right there. Jin on the other hand, closed his eyes in surprise, too shocked to react.

“Use me” Tae said when he broke the kiss to breath. “Don't go sleeping with strangers hyung, do it with me, use me instead” That's How desperate Tae was.

Anything, he would do anything to be closer to Jin, to feel him against his own body, to pretend Jin belonged to him, even for a night. He wanted to be useful to Jin, even if it was just as a toy, a rebound. Even if the process would tear him apart.

He kissed Jin again. This time though, Jin pushed him away.

“NO” he said.

“What?” Tae asked.

“I said NO Taehyung! I can't, I can't do it with you” SeokJin repeated.

If Taehyung's heart was broken before, it was now bleeding uncontrollably. SeokJin words had stabbed right in the core.

“Why hyung?” he asked, with another humourless laugh. “Am I not good enough for you? Or do you never think of as anything more than a younger brother? If it's the second than let it loose Hyung, I’ve been told I am a pretty good fuck”

SeokJin’s whole expression changed. He hid his face in his hands.

“No Taehyung, you don't get it! I can't do it because I love you! I have been in love with you for months!”

This time it was Tae's turn to be shocked.

“I thought I could never love again after Namjoon but I fell, I fell for you. I know you see me only as a friend. Probably a broken case you need to fix. You are way out of the league and we can never be.”

Taehyung was so surprised that he couldn't say a word. Jin on the other hand, took his silence as rejection, tears started running from his eyes.

“I tried to hide it, tried so much, but its out now. And now I have ruined our friendship, oh my god! Why am I so stupid? I ruin everything, um so sorry!! Please forgive me, UM SO SO SORRY”

And before Tae could react, Jin is already out of the room and in the elevator. Tae could only see him crying hysterically as the door was closing.

When Tae finally managed to get to the hotel lobby to follow him, Jin was nowhere to be found.