~14~

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Bucky

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Bucky

She was more than he ever deserved. He was aware of her presence...of her gentle touch and her kind words, but not what happened. It was the worst it had been in a while, he knew that much. Whatever HYDRA did to his brain was still there, and it hurt him like hell. It ached and nagged and it burned. And it didn't just hurt him. He opened his eyes to the light of morning and (y/n) in his arms. It brought him the most joy he'd felt since long before he fell off that train. That is, until he looked at her. Really looked at her. 

There were black circles around her beautiful eyes and her lips were chapped from nervous licking and biting. The skin on her face was tight where there were tear tracks. He lifted his hand to brush her hair out of her face when he saw the bruises. His eyes widened in sadness and anger. They were exactly the shape of his hands, puffy and inflamed, their deep red colour stuck out against her beautiful skin. They looked ugly on her perfect arms. He moved to untangle his arms from her body when she let out a small wince that made his heart ache. Her eyes fluttered open, capturing his in their warmth. He knew he looked scared to her, but she only raised her arm and placed it on the side of his stunned face. He began to wonder what he'd ever done to deserve to be on the receiving end of her loving, caring spirit.

"I," he started to speak when his voice caught and he faltered. He felt like an idiot. A mean, horrible, monster of an idiot, and felt a blush creeping up his cheeks. She smiled weakly and leaned to rest her forehead on his, filling his aching abdomen with butterflies. 

"No," she croaked. "I know what you're thinking. It wasn't you, it was them." A solitary tear fell down her cheek and he frantically wiped it away, gently sitting up and scooping her up into his arms. It broke his big heart in two to see her like this. He knew she was right, but no matter how hard he tried to shift the blame to the people who put him in this position he couldn't. He hated them. But in that moment he hated himself so much more.

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