The Other Side - A Jamilton Fanfiction

Chapter Five

Running. Cold. Trapped. Fear. Panic. Death.

Can't escape. Can't hide. Can't leave.

Stuck. Like an animal in a cage. Stuck and trapped and there isn't anywhere I can run where I am safe from him. There's no where I can go.

All I can do is run.

Run until my legs give way. Until my lungs stop working. Run until I can't run anymore.

Cold.

So cold it burns. The feeling of cold metal clamping down on my entire body. I can see my breath in the air. I can't feel myself anymore.

Can't breathe.

"Alexander!"

My head shot up, and I stopped in my tracks, trying to pin down the source of the noise, a disruption in the deathly silence of the night.

"Alexander, are you okay?! Come on! Come on, it's gonna be okay!" yelled the voice, seeming to be coming from all sides around me.

"Thomas?" I called back, recognizing the voice.

"ALEXANDER!"

~•~

"Alexander! It's okay, it's okay, I promise it's gonna be okay!"

My eyes shot open. It was dark, but I could feel my soft bed underneath me, and I knew that I was okay. Or at least, not dead.

There was a figure looming over me. For a moment, I thought it was the creature that was always hunting me in my dreams, and my breathing became irregular with panic. But as I squinted to try and make out facial features, I felt relief worm through my body.

"Thomas?" I whimpered as I tried to catch my breath.

"Yes! Yes, it's me!" he called back, relief heavily lacing his tone. I shot up and wrapped my arms around him, grateful for the warmth seeping back into my body. I felt him hug me back after a moment of hesitation, as if this had caught him off guard at first.

"Thomas," I repeated, clinging onto him as if he would dissolve in my arms if I didn't. My eyes were shut tight and my fingers were digging into the soft cotton of his shirt.

"What happened?"

"I— I don't know. A nightmare, I guess," I murmured as I let go of him. "Did I wake you up? Shit. I'm so sorry, I didn't mean—"

"It's okay, Alex," he said, his voice warm and gentle. He smiled at me, and all the cold in my body suddenly disappeared when he slid his hand against my arm.

I nodded in response.

"Wanna talk about it?"

I shook my head, crossed my arms in an attempt to seem collected, and avoided his gaze. My eyes slowly got used to the darkness, and I was able to make out the worried expression on his face.

"Nightmares are nothing to be ashamed of, Alexander. I have them all the time. Everyone does. It's okay."

I couldn't bring myself to meet his gaze. Warmth rushed into my cheeks, but this one was not welcome.

I couldn't think of anything to say, so silence hung heavy in the room for a good long time. Finally, Thomas carefully said, "My father died a good many years ago by the hands of someone else I really cared about. I sometimes still blame myself for what happened. I wonder if I could have saved him had I been there. And sometimes I have dreams where he comes to me and tells me that it's all my fault, that I let him die."