Chapter Twelve | Reconcile

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Wtf how do we already have 400 reads when it seems like there was 200 only yesterday!?
Anyway here's another chapter because ily guys~
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Josh flickered his gaze over to you with uneasy brown eyes and slightly parted lips. Perhaps you should have warned him beforehand. But alas, it was too late anyway. 

You stood off to the side while Tyler hesitantly strolled over to a chair. He sat across from Josh, as he doubted his friend would want to be anywhere near him.

It was quiet. Neither one of the boys knew who should start, nor did they even know how to start. You just watched, and considered saying something, but concluded that this was their conversation, not yours.

Tyler was the one to break the ongoing silence. "God, i'm such an idiot." He shook his head and chuckled to himself, head held low as he looked down at the floor. Guilt kept him from staring into those brown eyes. "I.. I shouldn't have said those things. I shouldn't have yelled at you, and I shouldn't have made you cry- fuck I made you cry!"

Tyler combed his fingers through his hair, and Josh never moved. He didn't even speak.

"I hurt you, didn't I?"

Nothing.

"I didn't mean to."

Silence.

"Please say something. Josh, please.."

"Why?" Josh chewed the inside of his cheek, a habit of his you recently discovered within the past couple of days. "Why do you leave?"

Tyler lifted his head, but to his disappointment it was Josh's turn to look away. However it wasn't guilt that simmered in the pit of Josh's stomach. Rather, it was the feeling of wanting to scream I know you're sick of me, so just run away why don't you? Yet he longed to share laughs by the flames, and smile fondly at his friend when the other wasn't looking. It was a heatless fire that gave him this nauseous feeling.

"I-" Tyler pursed his lips, brows furrowed out of frustration as he struggled to find the right words to say. He breathed a weak sigh. "I don't know, Josh. I'm sorry."

"Is it because of me?" Josh interrogated worriedly.

Tyler shook his head at the man. "Of course not."

"Is it him?"

Tyler didn't respond, which encouraged the concern that rose within his friend. Josh watched as Tyler briefly glanced elsewhere before meeting his eyes once again. "Can you forgive me?" He asked in a desperate tone. You watched from the sidelines and stared at Josh intensely, nervously awaiting his answer.

Josh gave a small nod, "I forgive you." You could tell he was being truthful, though something still seemed off with him. He still seemed.. distant.

A radiant smile tugged on the corners of Tyler lips and his honey brown eyes lit up with joy. "Really?" He stood from his seat, "I-Is it okay if I hug you?"

Josh never smiled, nor did his eyes change from their stormy gray tint. He looked like a rainy summer afternoon. "No," he muttered quietly, "Not today."

Tyler looked hurt for a moment. He was taken back by the refusal, and the sudden happiness that overcame him quickly backed down. He took a step back and frowned. "Oh, okay.." Tyler cleared his throat and started to turn around. "I'm going to check how dinner is coming along." He stopped, and looked over his shoulder slightly. "Josh?"

Josh looked in his direction, as well did you.

"I'll stay." And with that, he was gone. You wondered to yourself who he decided to stay for. The banditos? Josh? You? Definitely not himself. Once it was just the two of you left, you glanced over at the man who sat atop his bed.

"I'll go make a plate for you, okay?" He didn't say anything or move from his spot. The bags beneath his eyes were darker than the day before, you noticed. He looked sick, almost. 

When you returned to the tent with a plate stacked with warm vegetables and a glass of clean water in hand, Josh was tucked under a thin blanket. 

That night, Josh didn't eat dinner, just as he hadn't last night. Or the night before.

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Okay I know this was short, so sorry about that :< anywayyy hope you liked this angst :))))  

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