Bubble Wrap

chapter twenty-four

LOVE IS A complicated thing. It has all these twists and turns that I never expected. It took my breath away, both in the best way possible and the worst way imaginable. What makes it even harder is being in love with him.

A damaged heart.

I saw forever with him and for every reason there was to ends things, there was a million more to stay exactly where I was. I needed him. I wanted him. He destroyed me and he put me back together until I wasn't broken anymore. And then he broke me. Over and over again, but I was addicted. Addicted to my desire for him. Addicted to the way he made me feel when my heart wasn't breaking, because that feeling, that feeling was worth all the heartbreak.

And maybe that's my problem. Maybe it won't ever really work between us because I'm addicted to the broken pieces. His and mine. I'm addicted to fixing people. To making them better and I'll never learn better, because I don't know how to heal.

I don't know how to let go of my own damaged heart.

I don't know how to just be.

"Wheeler." Clark's breaks the bubble I'm in as I look up from the pages, seeing his leaning against the doorframe of my office with his arms crossed over his chest. "Didn't I give you the rest of the year off?" he asks.

My lips curl up slightly as I turn in my chair to face him. Christmas is Clark and his husband's favorite time of year, and he gives the entire office the last week and a half of the year off as our Christmas gift. Encouraging us to use the time to relax without the stress of work on our shoulders. "You did."

"Then why are you here?" he questions.

"I could ask you the same thing."

He smiles at me. "I came to pick up my daughter's Christmas gift that I've been hiding in my office for the last month and a half," he says. "Now, I believe you have a brother moving away in the new year, do you not? Go be with him and your family."

"I will!" I assure him. "I'm heading to Milton soon. I just wanted to make sure I had everything in order for the start of the new year."

"You are the most organized person I know. Go have some fun."

I nod. "Merry Christmas, Clark."

"Merry Christmas, Wheeler."

A content sigh falls from my lips as my eyes drop to the manuscript laid out in front of me. Clark is right. I am organized, and more than prepared for the start of the new year. With one last glance around the room, I collect my keys off the end of my desk and gather my stuff. The office is quiet as I cross the room to the elevators, finding my way out into the cold and toward the subway. The ride peaceful as I work through what I need to bring with me to Milton even if I'm only planning to spend a few nights, I will undoubtedly overpack.

Snow crunches beneath the soles of my boot as I walk home, my lips curling up at the rush of excitement in the pit of my stomach at the sight of Luke, who has his arms full of groceries as I approach. I pick up my speed to meet him as he reaches the steps leading up to our apartment building.

"Need some help?" I ask as I fall into step with him.

"Hey," he says, the corner of his lip lifting. "Mind grabbing the door for me?"

I nod as I pull my apartment keys out, unlocking the entrance door for the both of us. "Is this for Christmas?" I ask, eyeing the bags the multitude of bags hanging from his forearms.

"Sure is," he says. "A feast for one."

I turn to look at him, my lips turning down. "You're going to be alone?"