DYING IN LA | WHY DON'T WE SICKFICS

ANOREXIA - zach

REQUESTED BY:
Kaikai_Zonah

[potential trigger warning: eating disorder, mentions of self harm]
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"Zach! We need to leave in an hour."

Zach rolled over in bed, groaning as he tried to get comfortable again. He kept his eyes closed in hopes of getting more sleep, not ready to face the world quite yet.

"Zach!"

Zach growled, eyes snapping open as he glared at the closed door. "I'm up!" He relaxed as he heard the creaks in floorboards, the person walking away from the door.

Zach stared up at the ceiling, not an ounce of motivation within him, having to finally force himself out of bed.

As he stood, the rumbling of his stomach caught his attention. Zach frowned as he dragged himself into his bathroom and locked the door behind him.

He lifted his shirt over his arms, purposely avoiding looking into the mirror as he stripped and got into the shower. Zach didn't want to see the marks that littered his abdomen and hips, extending down his thighs and found again over the tops of his shoulders. He didn't need to see the physical reminder of what he'd done when he couldn't go a day without remembering them.

Zach stood directly under the water, eyes shut as he allowed the water to run freely over his face. Water ran rapidly past his lips, slipping in and moving on as Zach just let it be.

After twenty minutes, Zach reached for a towel to wrap around his waist as he dried off, leaning on the counter for a second to gather himself.

Zach hesitantly lifted his head, just enough to peek at his body. His flat stomach made him frown, Zach turning to view himself from the side. The lack of definition in his features made him compare himself to the other guys, remembering how all of them had what he wished he did.

While his stomach remained flat, he couldn't help but notice the slight pudge around his hips. Grabbing at his skin made his frown deepen as how noticeable his fat was.

Zach finally turned away from his reflection when he heard the door to his room open.

"Zach?"

The soft voice calling his name made Zach relax slightly, opening the bathroom door and walking back into his bedroom.

"Hey, baby. You need help picking something to wear?" Jack asked, smiling at his boyfriend as he walked into the room.

He nodded gratefully, pecking Jack's cheek before settling on the edge of his bed. He watched as Jack went through his closet, humming quietly to himself as he pulled out a pair of jeans and a simple t-shirt.

Zach stood to grab the clothes from him with a smile, subconsciously raising his towel a little higher on his hips to cover himself and the faded marks adorning his skin.

"Thank you." He pressed a light kiss to Jack's lips after taking them and pulling back. He chuckled slightly as Jack pulled him back in, his hands moving to rest on Zach's hips and pull him closer.

Zach's body tensed the slightest bit when Jack's hands touched that part of his skin, trying to relax and enjoy just being with his boyfriend without worrying about what he looked like.

He pulled back after a minute with a hazy smile, admiring his boyfriend.

"Now get changed. I'll be waiting downstairs with the guys." Jack told him, tapping his side lightly.

Zach nodded, Jack leaving him with one last peck.

Zach quickly changed, moving over to his full body mirror. His face slowly crumpled from its previous content state after Jack left him, a frown pulling his lips down. His eyes ran all over his body, his hands fidgeting to pull his pants up and make sure his shirt was straightened out. Zach turned to the side, flattening his shirt against his stomach, not feeling satisfied with how his stomach seemed slightly noticeable beneath his shirt.