Everlong

8

A month after finding out I was pregnant was when I finally saw Brian again. I was laying in bed, trying to sleep. I heard a knock on my front door so I peeked outside and saw his red jeep. I jumped out of bed and practically ran down the stairs, but I decided to play it cool when I opened the door. When I saw his face, I could tell that he felt bad. I silently opened the door wider to let him in and we went and sat on my couch. We didn't say much until he finally broke the silence.

"I'm sorry for the way I reacted, but you have to understand why I was upset."

"I get why you're upset, Brian. But telling me that I did it on purpose was so mean."

"You're right. I shouldn't have accused you of that, I'm sorry." We were quiet for a while again.

"Why are you here?" I asked him.

"I've thought a lot about what I wanted to do. I had to think about what I should do and what I wanted to do. I don't think I can be a father, 'Brina. I don't want this." 

"Well, I did tell you that this was your choice. But if you walk away from our child, don't think you can just come crawling back when you feel like it. I'm not doing that to them, it's not fair." He nodded his head.

"I just can't do it. I don't want to be a father." I felt myself start to cry.

"I think it's best if you left." I softly told him. He listened and I walked him to my door. Before he left, he turned around and kissed my forehead. 

"I love you so much. I wish I could be the man that you deserve." And he left. I slammed my front door closed and fell to the floor, crying. I started softly banging the back of my head against the door. All I wanted was for Brian and me to be a family. 

I'm currently 5 months pregnant and getting dressed for my gender reveal that Sal and Joe had decided to throw for me. Sal had always been there for me, and Joe got really protective of us when he found out that Brian wasn't going to be in the picture. 

"I just want to be the best uncle." Joe had told me one day. I guess I couldn't argue with that. I heard my name be called and I went downstairs to see Joe, Sal, Murr, Matt and his family, and other police officers. We played games and ate food and finally, it was time to cut the cake to see what color it was going to be. Joe came out of the kitchen and into the living room with the cutest looking cake I had seen. It was a yellow and black cake, with bumblebees and "Who will it bee?" written on the cake. 

"I got the idea from Giggle." He told me when he set the cake down in front of me. He works in a baby store.

"I love it!" I really did love it. Sal came up to me, holding a cake knife. 

"Are you ready?" He asked me. I nodded my head as fast as I could and took the knife from him. I slowly cut into the cake, and when I slid the knife out, there was purple frosting. I looked at it, obviously very confused. I started cutting the cake in multiple different spots, still finding purple. The guys started busting up laughing, and I looked at them.

"What's so damn funny?" I asked them, getting impatient.

"Congratulations! It's twins!" Joe yelled, throwing pink and blue confetti everywhere.

"You're having a boy, and a girl!" Sal was laughing with pure joy.

"You're joking. This is obviously a joke." I said in disbelief. 

"Nope!" Sal came over to me with the newest ultrasound. Sure enough, there were two babies there. Now I know why they wouldn't even let me see this last ultrasound. They had told me that it would 'ruin my surprise.'

After the party, Joe, Sal, Murr and I were cleaning up. 

"How am I supposed to take care of two babies on my own? I was scared enough when I thought it was just one."

"Don't worry, we'll be here for you," Murr told me.

"Does he ever ask about me?" I asked Sal. He stopped what he was doing and looked at me.

"Every time I see him."

"Does he know that it's twins?" Sal sadly shook his head at me and went back to what he was doing. I snuck out to the backyard and pulled out my phone. I called my number one on speed dial and his husky voice answered.

"Is everything okay?" Was the first thing he said to me.

"Everything is fine. I just found out something about the baby though. Not sure if you want to know or not."

"What's wrong with the baby?"

"Nothing's wrong. I didn't know if you wanted to know the sex or anything."

"I don't want to be a father, but I'm not a monster. I do want to know what my kid is like."

"Well, it's kids. As in plural."

"What?"

"It's twins, Brian. A boy and a girl." 

"Fuck."