Rental [yoonmin]

38.

"Are you sure you're okay, Jungkook?" Hoseok asked.

"I'm sure." He responded as he nibbled an ice cream cone.

"You don't seem to be enjoying that ice cream as much as you usually do. You haven't even talked shit about my ice cream. Something must be wrong."

Jungkook shook his head no, "Nothing's wrong." He mumbled.

Reality was, everything was wrong. Ever since the encounter with Taehyung two days ago, Jungkook's world had been falling apart.

More than usual. 

"You've been acting so strange. Please, tell me what's burdening you? Is it me? Something I did?"

Jungkook looked at Hoseok and sighed, he looked extremely concerned. It made Jungkook feel so shitty for making it seem like he was the problem.

"Hoseok, believe me, it's not you. It would never be you."

"Then?" He asked curiosity spilling through his pores.

"I want to go to a place where nobody knows my name."

"What? Why?"

Jungkook shrugged, "Maybe it'll help me heal."

"What happened?"

"I just ... don't understand, Hoseok. That's all."

"Understand what?"

"I don't understand why it doesn't bother him that we barely talk? I don't understand why he doesn't think of me? I don't understand why nothing I ever do is enough for him?"

Jungkook looked at his cone which was starting to melt. He suddenly felt grossed out and he wasn't enjoying the taste in his mouth.

He threw it to the trash can and crossed his arms across his chest. They were currently sitting on a bench observing the beautiful blue sky.

"It's him again," Hoseok said quietly.

"Yeah," Jungkook sighed.

"I really don't like this dude. I don't like the way he makes you feel. You shouldn't feel that way at all."

"I can't stop my feelings for him. I don't know how." He whispered. He was intensely watching the clouds trying to not fall apart.

Hoseok, on the other hand was observing Jungkook and his every gesture. "Listen, I know what I tell you probably won't make you feel better. I'm going to tell you either way. He's toxic. You need to let go,"

Jungkook remained quiet. He kept lightly biting his cheek. He wanted to cry, but he couldn't. He was too tired of crying. Too tired of being sad. Just too tired.

"He's drowning you and he's describing the water. He's opening the faucet and you're watching him do it."

Jungkook nodded, "I'm aware. I've been drowning for a while."

"Jungkook, look at me."

Jungkook slowly turned his gaze and looked at Hoseok. He softly ran his fingers up his cheeks onto the bottom of his eyes.

"Has he been taking your sleep away?"

Jungkook nodded, Hoseok sighed quietly. "I was suppose to be over him. But, every night I think of him. Sometimes at 1 o'clock, sometimes at 2, either way he's constantly in my mind. I keep seeing him in my dreams. Not even sleeping helps me get rid of his image."

"What happened? Something must've triggered all of this." Hoseok said and he brought his hands back to his thighs.

"He's always been on my mind. I just kept making myself think that I was okay."

Hoseok remained quiet he hated that he couldn't make Jungkook happy. He really wanted to, but the problem was that Hoseok wasn't Jungkook's lover.

And Jungkook didn't love Hoseok the way he wanted him to.

"I spoke to him two days ago," Jungkook said randomly.

Hoseok nodded finally understanding why his mood had been so deflated lately, "And?" He ask quietly.

"And he told me a lot of things that were mean and truthful. He didn't apologize or anything like that, but that's okay."

"That's not okay! He should apologize to you for everything he's done!"

"An apologize won't put my heart back to pieces."

"I know it won't but that's just the right thing to do. If he hasn't apologized to you is because he's heartless."

"It's a lot ... I don't want to talk about it anymore."

"Not talking about it won't get rid of it."

"I called him a monster and although he didn't show it I know it hurt his feelings. I thought I'd feel happy about it but knowing I hurt him...hurts me too." Jungkook whispered.

"You're one of the gentlest persons I've ever met. Do you know that?"

"I'm just stupid. I allow my emotions to control me when I know what's right from wrong." Jungkook laughed.

"You're kind. That's not stupid. That makes you human and who you are."

Jungkook nodded still very upset. "I'm scared." He admitted.

"Of?"

"Trusting another person. I don't want this to happen again. I don't want to expose myself and give it my all to someone who doesn't feel the same way I do. I don't want to pour my heart out for it to be made fun of."

Hoseok cupped his face and looked into his eyes intensely. "Okay, I know I shouldn't say this. But can you guess what? I'm going to say it because that's the type of person I am. I struggle to not show my emotions and when I feel something I want to show it. So, I'm going to tell you straight up. I like your smile, I like your personality, I like your smile, I like the way you think and how incredibly kind you are. I just like you."

Jungkook stood still almost breathless, "What?" He questioned quietly.

"I like you. We've spent so much time together I just feel like I can't live without you anymore. I know it hasn't been that long and I know you're hurt right now. Let me show you what love feels like. Please, allow me to show you what it is to be loved. It would be my greatest pleasure to be a part of your life unconditionally. To be the one you think of, the one you kiss, the one you love."

"I ..." Jungkook couldn't even speak. His words were jumbled together and he couldn't get a word out.

Hoseok let go of his face and scooted closer to him with the sweetest smile. "I'm not asking you out or anything like that. I just want you to know that there's other people besides him. Don't him ruin your idea of love."

Jungkook gulped. His face was tinted pink from Hoseok's words and from the looks he was giving him.

"I'll leave the company for you. I'd do it. Just ask me to."

Jungkook remained quiet, it was too much to process. Hoseok wrapped his pinkie around Jungkook's and kept smiling.

"It's fine you don't have to give me answers right now. I'm patient enough to wait for you. I understand that you're confused and scared, but trust me. I'm not him."

They looked at each other for seconds even minutes. Hoseok wanted to say so much more but soon found himself be drawn to Jungkook's brown pupils.

Jungkook's eyes stole every word away.