Defiance

1.6

Chapter 16

E L Y S I A

    Do you know what I needed? A spell to stop making me feel whatever Aldric was making me feel! And to hold me to sleep like that? The audacity. I groaned in frustration. He just got to walk out like that while asking me weird questions about my previous relationships. What about him?

What about all the women he was with? What about his mate? The realization hit me. Wolves have mates. Did his mate know Aldric was hiding a witch in his bedroom? But that didn't make sense. If Aldric did have a mate, shouldn't she be sleeping in the same bedroom as him? She should.

Did that mean he didn't have a mate? Had he not found her? Was she dead? That might explain his behavior. Then I felt horrible for even thinking something like that. Not only was he tortured by some ultra-powerful witch, but there was a high chance his mate wasn't alive. That was horrible.

Despite it all, he wasn't as cruel as I thought someone in his position might be. He never hurt me and I didn't think he ever would. I knew he never would. Regardless, if he did have a mate, I would never allow him to be near me ever again.

    Gods. That's it, I decided. Stop thinking about him. Except I couldn't. All I could think about was him. All I could think about was the softness of his body, his scent. We spend so much time determined to avoid each other's touch, I didn't realize how much I truly craved it. His touch wasn't disgusting, it was the most breathtaking feeling in the world.

Being in his arms didn't just make me feel safe, it made me feel at home. How could someone's arms be home?

    Everything about the situation was horrible. I wanted to slap my heart into some common sense.

Do you ever hear yourself?

Sure he might hold me like that and sure he might act as he cared, but the truth of the reality was that he was a wolf. And he would never feel the same way. It wasn't possible. There was too much bloodshed between us for him to look at me any differently than a lost little witch. Maybe he just needed a friend but why am I still attached?

I was so enraged with myself. I was going to stay away. I sat in my corner of Aldric's bedroom and stared at the magic book. The only thing that was successfully able to keep my mind off Aldric was magic.

Before doing so, however, I took a bath and changed into a new dress and undergarments. I tried my best to fix the wet uneven curls of my hair but it was useless. My hair didn't want to cooperate with me. Regardless, I finally had the dresses to look presentable; I wasn't going to mess it up by not grooming myself properly.

I stared at my appearance. For the first time, I realized the redness in my cheeks was back. After being in the winter in the Mae Coven's village, I was sure I would die of starvation. Somehow, when I thought I was going to die, I ended up in a wolf's castle, with more luxuries than I ever had. Yet, I was alongside the enemy.

What kind of curse was I under?

I went back to Aldric's bedroom and sat at my corner on the floor. I was debating whether or not I should sit on his bed, but I decided against it. As much as I wanted to, it didn't feel right to sit there.

Then, I memorized the pages of Augela's magic book. Today I learned about magical beings other than witches - the werewolves, the familiars, the spirits, the vampires. So much information I never knew. I read and understood and memorized. I wondered how High Priestess Angela was able to attain such information.

         When Aldric came that in the night, he didn't say much. In fact, it was strange how he almost seemed to avoid me when last night we slept in the same bed. He placed the plate of food on the table.