On Her Majesty's Secret Service ~ H.S.

Chapter 24

Harry and I don't talk for the rest of the day. In fact, we don't even make eye contact. Training exercises turn into torture as we avoid each other's gaze and the snide snickers of the other recruits, all of which must know what happened in the showers by now.

What did happen in the showers? It almost seems like something out of a dream. Harry and I surely didn't kiss, right? Harry Styles, the man I hate. Or hated. I don't hate him anymore, but still... I never thought it would come to this.

In the shooting range, we choose the targets farthest away from each other. During agility, the playful competition we used to have ceases to exist as we complete our assignments in silence. I try to avoid the gaze of the others, but it's hard when they all seem to be staring.

It probably wasn't the best idea to do it in front of anyone. But how was I supposed to know it was going to happen? It's not like Harry gave me a heads up before he kissed me. And I suppose I didn't give him a heads up when I kissed him back.

Why did I kiss him back? What in the world would have possessed me to do such a thing? I came to this training program focused on one thing: becoming an agent. I'm still focused on that, of course I am. Or at least I want to convince myself it's still my greatest priority. Considering that the other night I failed our mission to rescue Harry, I wonder if I might be getting a little side tracked.

It's just, with everything that's happened this week, my feelings... well... I'm not sure. I saved Harry during the mission and held him as he cried. He held me as we slept and I did the same in return. I recall the night after our mission at the night club when I took the diplomat back to his apartment. Harry didn't seem very happy with me afterwards. Could this be why?

But how could Harry ever have those sort feelings towards me? He's made fun of me, made so many snide and rude comments, I never thought he would want anything more. I guess I was wrong. Maybe it was just a one time thing. Maybe we were both just caught up in the moment. After all, we have been locked up in a concrete cellar for nearly 2 months, no contact with the outside world... But I would never have kissed Mac or Adam. Only Harry.

What the hell is wrong with me? I could be jeopardizing my position at MI6. I'm not exactly sure where General Sanders stands on office relations, but I'm sure he doesn't have an extremely positive outlook.

When the day is finally over I head to dinner. Harry doesn't make an appearance, and I have no idea where he could be. I'm not eager to find out. As soon as I have to talk to Harry either we'll completely ignore everything that happened, like the way we ignore how we sleep together, or it'll be so awkward I can barely get out a full word. For some reason, the former bugs me. Do I really want to ignore what happened?

I take a seat at a table alone and shovel food into my mouth carelessly, too caught up in my own thoughts to give the action my full attention. When I'm about halfway through, somebody takes the spot across from mine.

I glance up, and for a split second my heart swells with hope. Is Harry here to talk to me maturely about everything that happened this morning? When I meet the soft brown eyes and pixie cut that Sarah wears, my expectations grind to a halt.

I meet her gaze and see something behind it that I can't identify. I shoot her half a smile, but she only sits in silence with a look of anticipation on her face. I think I know where this is going.

"Have something to tell me?" She questions. I remember when I truly hated Harry and Sarah seemed to be my only friend here. Since him and I have grown closer, I've barely talked to any of the other recruits. I used to think it was for the purpose of becoming a better agent, but now I wonder if my engrossment was for different reasons.