Just a machine (rk800 x rk900)

Chapter 4. Depression

Warning :there are suicidal thoughts here, and self harm. Skip this chapter if your uncomfortable.

I was in my room thinking about what happened today, I still had tears in my eyes. I couldn't believe it. I just wished this was a nightmare. I felt like I was suffocating, I just wanted to die. I didn't wanna live anymore. That's when I heard the door open. I guessed that was Conan. I heard footsteps coming closer to my room.

A knock. A voice called up my name.

"Connor.. Are you there?" he said softly.

I didn't bother to answer. I just wanted this to be a nightmare, but I knew this was real. I just didn't want to believe it.

"well I-if you need anything you can just ask me ok?......." he walked away. The footsteps faded away.

-------------------1 week Later-------------------

Since androids were equipped with human abilities. Connor wanted to, he told himself a couple of times he wouldn't do it. Connor broke.

He took a piece of scrap metal from a drawer. Able to cut synthetic skin. He turned on the pain simulation..

He rolled up his sleeve. He flinched once the metal was cutting across his skin he gritted his teeth. When he was finished he drop the metal on the ground, it made a slight noise.

There he was, he didn't move he was just there.... Sitting down. Why can't I just be normal for once, why did everyone I care about leave, I-it's not fair! "why can't they just leave me alone.. But I want to be with someone that cares about me, if only Conan wasn't a machine..

-with conan-
I heard a noise of metal drop to the floor. I wanted to know what Connor was doing in there. I just wanted to knock on his door and ask.. Why do I care about him.

"Am I going deviant?".