Just Friends

Chapter 11 Confused Yue Yue (from Yue Yue's POV)

When I came back to my room I realized that I'd almost gone for real with staying in his room, in his bed, for the night. Evidently I was being in some savage mode. I hadn't been joking when I started to take my pants off. But when I saw his face, I'd immediately retreated from the idea. It showed that he was scared of being with me so intimately.

This hadsome boy was apparently inexperienced in the sex departament. Or maybe I had interpreted few of our encounters wrongly. I thought that he'd been into me a little, at least as much as wanting me to spend the night with him.

Not that I was in any way more expirienced, but I obviously wanted to stay there, I was quite sure about it and I wasn't afraid.

Why did I want to stay there anyway? Do I fancy him now more than before? Enough to sleep with him? I was having the analysis moment in my own bed instead of physically experimenting one in his.

Above all I felt comfortable with him, the thought of being with him in one bed was quite nice. I wasn't necessarily thinking about having actual sex with him, but some touching... or perhaps kissing wouldn't harm anybody.

When I was with Hu Yitian, I had loved hugging, touching, skimming, rubbing, teasing, kissing everywhere on the body. The so called fore play was exactly my thing. I wanted it to last forever. But I couldn't have that with him, because he had always wanted the next step. The maximum I'd let him do was to dry hump me once. He had come and I had not. I felt used after, not myself, ashamed, guilty like I had been doing something nasty. Since that he wouldn't have given me a break from nagging me about sex, but I didn't want it anymore. I became certain that my virginity is not his to take. This guy wouldn't have cherished it enough.

But that moment in my room I wasn't thinking about Hu Yitian and his sex madness that had overshadowed our already brittle relationship. I was thinking about Wang He Di and his gentleness. How completely different he was, compare to Hu Yitian. He had some traits of overbearing, cocky, impulssive male (like when he had grabbed my hand or carried me on his shoulder without my consent), but they were counterbalanced, at least for now, with kindness, thoughtfulness and tenderness he had shown at multiple occasions. It was nice to be around him. I actually liked this guy now.

Besides his touch had felt so right. I had wanted him to touch me, to never take his hands off of me. Like I was made to be touch by him, only him, forever. Maybe I didn't realized it entirely then. Instead I was just pretty confused with what was happening, with my sudden urge to stay in his room. I couldn't accept I wanted him this much, physically. I tried to brush it off. Like it didn't happened, like it happened just because I was drunk. As I finally believed my own brief lies, I fell asleep with a seemingly clear conscience.

***

That night I dreamt about him, in his bed with me, kissing every inch of my body. The dream was so real, that when I woke up, few strokes down there were enough to make me come. I was profusely wet, I don't think I had ever been this wet before.

I couldn't deny my desire for him anymore. After the orgasm the first thing that came to my mind was the series of questions. Would he be able to fulfill my desire? To touch me exactly how I need it? Make me come? Give me the pleasure I was longing for and never was given? Will it feel right? Does he even want to do that to me?

Yesterday he had been so intimidated. I should have given him some space. Not forced myself on him. I had pushed him too much already. Asking if he liked me naked? How could I have been so bold? He had even pleaded me not to pressure him, but I still asked him again. Alcohol was always my worst advisor.

'I cannot stop thinking about it now.'

This sentence resonated in my head, made me blush for the hundredth time. His voice had been so low and hoarse, so sexy. We had almost kissed right after, but instead I felt him on my clit. He was hard, we were both aroused and it wasn't only me. That moment of touching each other's sexes, it had sent an exquisite shiver throughout my whole body. I wanted him like crazy then, but it was impossible at that stage of knowing each other, too early for all of this. At least I had managed to refrain. Poorly though, after all I almost accepted his invitation for 'a sleepover'.