What He Never Said ✔️

chapter five • evangeline

"I was learning to always expect the worst. I was learning how to hate life."
- Elias Witherow

Still in my suit coat, I lie on my bed. My eyelids are heavy with sleep that won't come. I've never been more exhausted, but I'm too wired to rest.

I'm so pissed at myself. Not only did I drive Raelyn to kill herself, but now I've ruined her funeral, too.

I was just so angry. My sister's always been an emotionally inept dunderhead, but she truly outdid herself today. She should have listened to Levi's speech instead of taking offense and having a tantrum. Admittedly, my outburst was no better. I caused just as much of a scene and embarrassed myself beyond mending. I should have kept my mouth shut. I was mad at Gemma for being selfish, but I was just as bad.

"What the fuck is wrong with me?" I wonder aloud.

Benson. That's what's wrong with me. He ruined my childhood, not to mention Raelyn's life. He hurt her in a way that she couldn't recover from. I saw the look in her eyes when I mentioned my older brother's name. She was terrified.

And now she's dead.

In desperate need of fresh air, I stand up. I'll go for a walk. Maybe that will clear the cobwebs that have been spun around my brain.

As I open my bedroom door, I see Gemma and Levi in the hallway. She moved out a year ago, so I'm surprised to see her exiting her old room.

She surprises me even more when she extends her hand, beckoning for me to slip my fingers through hers.

"Thought you were mad at me," I mutter. I know I'm still not thrilled with her.

"I was," she replies, "but like you said, today isn't about me."

I can't help but smile. Gemma's a moron sometimes, but she's a good person deep down. Taking her hand, I say, "I guess you can't help it. You've always been a princess."

"Ain't that the truth," Levi mumbles.

Gemma glares at him. "Mom and Dad got pizza," she informs me. "We should eat it while it's hot. I guess Benson started without us."

Fuck. Benson's still here. I thought he would have gone home to his fancy condo by now. I'm not in the mood to socialize with him, even if pizza is involved.

Today's already been painful enough.

"What's wrong, man?" Levi questions me. He must have noticed the change in my mood. He's always been an observant guy.

"I, uh, should get changed first," I stutter, hoping my excuse sounds believable. "I don't want to get sauce on my suit coat. I'll... I'll meet you guys down there."

Quickly, I draw back into my room and shut the door. I don't intend on coming out until Benson is gone.

<>*<>*<>*<>*<>

"You guys want to be what?"

"Foster parents."

"Aren't you too old for that?"

"No, Bowie, we're not too old."

I offer a sheepish grin, hoping Mom and Dad aren't too offended. I don't know much about the foster system. From what Winter's told me, it's super fucking corrupt. She's majoring in psychology. One day, she hopes to be a social worker and fix the broken system.

My parents, apparently, know a thing or two about it as well. I just discovered that they not only have their foster licenses and are looking to take in a child, but the child they want to welcome into our home in none other than Evangeline Porter.