Someone You Loved ; Caleb Finn

3

I look out at the boys watching them play with their phones and talk quietly.
"Order up Lumi." I hear Bob yell behind me. I turn around my shoes clicking against the black and white checkered tile. I put the netted basket on my round tray and picked up, steading it on my shoulder. I push my back against the door as I turn to walk to the table. I set it down on a table near me.
"Burger with grilled onions," I say handing them to the boy with dark brown curly hair. He smiles and nods his head.
"Burger, no ketchup?" I say as holding it up, the pale blonde boy boy raises his hand. I hand it to him gently. He was a lot smaller and paler.
"Thanks love." he says. I smile blushing a little.
"Finally, a burger with no lettuce." I say softly handing it to the last boy.
"Do you need anything else?" I ask sweetly.
"Can we get a basket of fries and I need some more pop." The tan curly headed boy says.
I nod my head picking up his cup. "I'll be right back."
I refill the drink when Bob practically throws the basket of fries at me. I grumble walking over and snatching the fries and take it to the boys.
"Thank you." He says sipping his drink.
"Caleb's said he's sorry." The blonde boy said with a mouthful of food.
"He didn't know you were working today. He said you don't normally work Tuesday's." He looks up at me and shoves a fry into his mouth. I bite the inside of my cheek and hum out a 'mhm'.
"Well...enjoy your food boys." I quietly let out looking down frowning and walk to my next tables and start to tend to them trying to avoid that table at all costs.
45 minutes later and the boys were sitting there just hanging out. I've refilled there drinks multiple times and the check just lays on the table untouched. I come by and the quiet boy that's sitting alone hands me his card. I ring up his card and bring him back his receipt.
"Thank you for such a delicious lunch," The curly haired boy says towering above me as he scoots out of the booth. I nod my head as I watch them walking out the door without looking back.
I turn to the table and start to pick up all the tips the boys left. The curly headed boy left a 20 and a napkin with his number on it. I sigh stuffing it in my apron and clean up the rest of the mess.
By the time my shift is over it's dark outside and my bandaids have flaked off leaving my ankles sore and red. I quickly grab my bag and change into some vans and walk out of the diner ignoring Bob's comments about me staying over for overtime. I stop at a small Starbucks on the way home and get a small black coffee and a large muffin. I use today's tips to pay for it when my fingers brush over the small napkin. I pull it out looking at it before chucking it in the bin as I leave the shop. I walk up the 4 floors since the elevator is almost always broken in this damned apartment. I get to my door as I pull out the old set of keys and jam it into the lock since the lock as been broken for a while now. I open the door the squeak breaking the awful silence of this apartment. I drop my bag on my couch and walk straight to the bathroom.
I turn on the bath and peel the gross dress off and throw them in my dirty clothes basket.
I look in the mirror and take my hair down from the tight bun it's been in all day. I sigh the feeling of my hair going back to its natural position feeling amazing.
I grab a makeup wipe and wipe whatever is left of my concealer, smudging the mascara around my eyes until I look like the grim reaper.
My skin is dull and I have a sickly pale color to my naturally tan skin. I open my drawer below my skin as I rummage through it not looking down for it.
I feel my my finger sting as I find What I'm looking for.
[Warning: Self Harm]
I pull the small piece of metal I got from a women's razor that I tore apart. I turn the bath off as I sink into the scolding hot water, my skin turning a light pink. I submerge myself into the water until my nose is just above the water line. I pull my finger tips out of the water look at the small piece of metal I'm still holding.
It's clean. New.
I sigh glancing at it. Caleb would've stopped me.
He could've stopped me.
But he's not here anymore.
Just me and this piece of metal.
The only thing that can comfort me when I'm alone.
I'm going under and this time I fear there's no one to turn to.
I bring my right arm up as my left hand meets the skin on my right.
I feel the stinging of my skin tearing but the pain is nothing compared to when he left me alone.
To fight my thoughts alone.
Fuck you Caleb.
a/n: this is being wrote on a plane. Hi guys. So this is type of stuff won't be in every chapter but it will be pretty normal as Lumi does battle with herself mentally with multiple disorders you'll later find out in the story.
Fun Fact: the italicized phrases are lyrics from the song that inspired this book
Maddie xoxo