Avenge The Fallen | Peter Parker x Reader

Endgame - Part 5 - Five Years Later

May's apartment felt bigger than I remembered it. I guess with all three of us, it felt more cramped. I had never minded. I'd been with my family.

"You gonna be okay here, on your own, (Y/N)?" A voice asked from behind me.

"What?" I turned around and Steve was looking down at me in concern at the doorway. "Oh, yeah."

"You sure?" Natasha pushed her way past the captain and rested her hand on my arm as I rested on the kitchen table. "You could stay at the Avengers Facility with me or-"

"I'll be fine, Nat," I gave her a weak smile.

"Oh, honey," Nat pulled me into a hug and I sighed. I didn't want to stay on my own, but it was the only way to heal myself.

"We should get going," Steve interjected. I pulled away to see the blonde with tears in her eyes, and I could feel some in my own. "See how Tony's settling in."

I nodded and wiped my nose.

"I'll be okay," I said again, to reassure them or myself I didn't know. Steve walked into the apartment and gave me a hug.

Even if he was a little stiff, I knew he cared about me.

"Promise you'll call," Natasha stared at me as she headed toward the door after Steve.

"Promise," I nodded but didn't smile. I waved them out and closed the door behind them before I broke down into tears.

It was going to be a long time before I would be okay.
~~~
"I can't stay here, Nat," I said into my phone as I shoved some shirts into a duffel that rested on my bed. My voice was gravelly and cracked every few letters, and my appearance was even worse.

"It's only been a few days, (Y/N)," Natasha said. I could sense her worry through the phone but I kept packing. "We're all hurting. You just have to give it a while."

At this I stopped packing and sucked in a breath. "How long is a while? A few more days? Months? Years?"

"I don't know-"

"Exactly! You don't know!" Tears began to well in my eyes, and my voice raised in volume. "Peter was my best friend. He's the only thing I've ever loved since my mom died, and my dad cheated on my step mom. And now he's gone too, Natasha. And we're stone-less, so we can't bring him back, can we?"

There was silence on the line, and I immediately felt bad, but I kept going anyway.

"He is dead. So is May! And this stupid apartment is only a reminder of that," my voice began to lower and the tears went away. I took a deep breath and looked around my room, at all of the pictures of memories hanging around my room.

I looked at the one of Peter, Ned and I at Coney Island together when we were 14, and then at the picture of Tony, Peter and I when I was recruited into the Avengers. They felt like forever ago, and it hurt.

"I just need to leave," I said, my voice almost a whisper as I sat onto the mattress.

"Okay," Natasha said, equally as quiet after a moment of silence. I heard her sniff, and I knew I'd messed up. She was only trying to help. "Where will you go?"

"I'm not sure yet," I answered truthfully. The conversation was now tense, and guilt piled on my shoulders.

"How are you going to afford travelling? Gas?" Natasha pushed. I knew she was trying to rationalize, but it was making me pissed.

"I know the code to my college fund," I said pointedly. "I don't think I'll be using it on school anymore, and there's enough to get me going, at least."