Chapter 4

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by RiahFlawless

by RiahFlawless

Poussey's POV

It's been about a couple of weeks since Yn and I kissed for the second time and I try to talk to her, but it's like she's avoiding me. She still sends me sweet smiles and I return the smile, but it's not the same as talking. I might have confused her, but she did kiss me back. Now she's confusing me.

Right now I'm on my way to the library and Yn is in her normal spot on the floor, now done with the Hunger Games books, reading Fault in our Stars. I approach her hesitantly. "You know you can sit in a chair at a table right?" I say making her laugh.

"Yeah I know. I just like to be alone." She says.
I take the hint and walk away. "Wait, Poussey. I didn't mean it like that. I like your company." She stands up.
"You don't act like it."
"I'm sorry I was just confused." She says grabbing my arm. I didn't even know I said that out loud. I looked at her and then at her hand on my arm. She let me go and looked down.
"Look I understand you don't swing my way, but ghosting me and then trying to be friends ain't cool. You can go somewhere with that bullshit." I say trying not to get loud. I notice Taystee glance over and I honestly don't care. I know that I pissed Yn off, but she didn't show it.
"I'm sorry, P." She says putting the book down and walking away.

Yn's POV

I'm not going to lie, that did hurt, but she's right. I shouldn't have walked out after we kissed. I should've talked to her. Now it's going to be hard to get her to talk to me. I don't even know why I care this much, it's not like I like her in that way. Well I don't think I do. Ugh I'm soooooo confused.

"Hi I'm Brook." An overly excited Asian girl approaches me. "Well I guess you're supposed to call me Soso because everybody goes by last names. I know it doesn't sound like a real last name but it is. Funny thing about last names-"
"Hey!" I yell to get her to stop. "I'm Yn. It's nice to meet you Soso, now would you please go bother someone else." I say as calmly as I can.
"You're nice. Sorry for talking so much." She smiles walking away. I'm glad to know I didn't make another person hate me. I then see Chapman looking how I feel.
"Are you okay? You look how I feel." I ask.
"Yes I'm fine."
"If you want to talk I'm a good listener."
"Well in that case, I feel like shit. Everybody is scared of me and I'm at the point where I don't give a damn anymore." She sighs.
"It'll get better. I've felt like that before. If there's anything else you wanna talk about I'm here." I say and she smiles.
"Thanks." She says walking away.

.....

Nothing ever happens in this place I'm bored out of my mind. The dinner bell just rang, so I'm at my normal post near the kitchen, listening to almost everybody complain about Chapman getting Furlough. I don't get what the big deal is, her grandmother is dying for Gods sake. Then I actually pay attention to what everybody is saying. Poussey stands out. She says "People in here ask for Furlough because their mother's die, but noooo Chapman's grandmoms gets sick and the world stops for her." That breaks my heart. I wouldn't know what to do if my mom died and I wasn't there. Now I feel like an even bigger asshole.

Chapman then stands up and says "Yes I am white. Yes I got Furlough, but you won't sit here and fuck with me for loving my grandmother. I guess white privilege wins again."
"The fuck." I say under my breath. Then Suzanne throws her pie at the back of Chapman's head. Everybody gasps, but I don't. She deserved it with that last statement. She then looks at Suzanne and then at me like I was going to do something.
"You're seriously not going to do anything?" She asks me.
"Sorry I can't let your 'white privilege' win this time." I say making everybody laugh. Even the white people. Poussey even laughed and then mean mugged me once she looked at me.

Chapman storms out to wash her hair. Then Officer Maxwell comes up to me laughing. I raise my eyebrow at her. "That was funny Yn." She says laughing still. "As funny as you not standing up for your own people?" She looked confused. "Don't act stupid. You're like every other officer in here treating the black women like it's the 50s. I'm not saying give special treatment, but treat them as if they were equal to everybody else. The segregation," I pointed at the different tables, "is a prime example. They feel like they can't intermingle because of how they are treated by the officers. I'm not trying to degrade you, I'm just trying to give you some advice."
"Thanks I guess. I still like you better than the other officers." She walks back to where she was standing.

Poussey then walks pass me to the trash can and gives me a small smirk. She probably still won't talk to me, but that was progress. On her way to sit down I stop her and she gives me a blank stare. "I'm sorry about your mom." I say.
"It's cool. It is what it is. I can't do nothing about it now." Her voice shakes and she goes to sit down.

I still don't know what to say to her, but now I feel even worse for avoiding her.