Breakthrough

Chapter Five

I sigh as I try and do my homework and grab my phone from next to me. As I open it and dial his number, I try to come up with a list of reasons why this is a terrible idea. I said I was done with him yet here I am pressing the digits of his phone number that I have memorized, my fingertips are quickly familiar with this pattern, with this phone number.

It rings a few times, you can get out of this now just end it now before he realizes its you calling my subconscious adds, and with that said he answers the phone.

"Hello", the sound of his voice sends shivers through my spine and my heart feels like it has stopped beating for a few brief moments.

"Hello?", he asks this time and I realize that I haven't said a word.

"Urm hello", I shakily reply.

"Yes?", he's getting impatient.

"I heard the news, and I just wanted to see how you were doing."

"Seriously? Are you kidding me just mind your own business for once", ouch that really shot a sting to my heart, but I know him he's hurt and I can't get mad at him now.

"Are you okay?"

He takes a moment before he answers,"No."

Just as I was getting ready to reply back he says, "Listen I know that I hurt you a lot and that I really destroyed you", to be frank I wasn't expecting him to say 'I'm sorry' he is very rarely sorry about anything.

"It's—", I was about to say its fine to just put him at ease a little bit, but it wasn't fine and it never will be instead I say,"You had no right to treat me like crap, when I was trying my absolute best to be nice with you after everything you've done."

"I know, but I only treated you like crap to know that you're dealing with crap."

That doesn't even sound the slightest bit of sense, but with him it does because its Ryder, and even though I'm done with him I hate to admit that I have a soft spot for him.

"Well you made me feel like crap, complete crap."

"You're not", we both stay silent on the phone for a while and I try my best to not say anything that will anger him because this is the longest we've ever gone without fighting.

"I know that we aren't exactly on the best terms right now, but if you ever wanna talk about anything or something, I'm here for you okay", I assure him even though I know he will never EVER confide in me, it's just not in his nature to trust people easily.

"I appreciate that, but I won't rely on anyone , not anymore."

I sigh, "Ok."

"Well goodnight", I say and end the call before he can answer.

That went better than expected, I had prepared myself for a full lash out from him. He must be really hurt if he apologized, or rather was thoughtful in talking to me for once. He really loved her, loves her I remind myself he most definitely is still in love with her, she was the first girl after Heather that he showed off to his friends, and made sure everyone knew she was his, when she was his, he was so damn proud that the person he wanted also wanted him, but nothing stays like that forever, not with someone like him.

For once I went to bed peacefully, knowing that we were at a good place this time, it probably won't stay this way for long, but it's good to soak it up while I can.

It's been a few weeks since I had last spoken to Ryder, but things were good. True when we pass each other in the hallways it's as if we're strangers and act as if we've never spoken to one other but as long as we aren't giving death glares I think we're safe .