limerence.

𝙎𝙏𝘼𝙍 𝘾𝙍𝙊𝙎𝙎𝙀𝘿 𝙇𝙊𝙑𝙀𝙍𝙎.

you're the first boy i've ever met with brick hands with bloodied knuckles and calloused fingertips hands with cuts following the lines on your palms hands that seem to be bruised a bit too often

and you hold me like i'm glass you hold me like i'm the shards of the window that once used to separate us. it wasn't anything that you couldn't break with a single touch  

and when i first met you, i thought you were an angel someone too gentle and kind to know any type of pain at all but the first time i saw you bleed from your nose you told me it wasn't anything you hadn't felt before.

and i imagined your first fight maybe somebody grabbed the burning halo above your head and it may have singed their hands but they were cowardly enough to snap it into two unaware of the glory that it would unleash   maybe that's why there's that band-aid there that i've never noticed before maybe that's why it doesn't shine as brightly as it did in your old pictures

and maybe somebody even tried to steal your wings and that would explain why you're missing so many feathers maybe that's why sometimes you wake up feeling like a part of you is missing maybe that's why sometimes you don't know why you're so sad  

it would explain why you're still trying to relearn how to fly and i wonder if you ever will again i really hope you do but i also fear that day  

my love, i know you're not icarus but i'm afraid of you loving me as much as he loved the sun i don't want to ruin you  

you told me that you left heaven in search of a new one because the smiles on the angels' faces began to look more like demons' grins and you realized that God shouldn't be this mean that the real God you've heard about would be much more forgiving that the real God you've read about wouldn't take pleasure in staining your white robe  

you told me that you escaped hell but while you were there you often wondered if angels could have guardian angels and if you could, then where was yours?  

baby i may not have brick hands but my heart is concrete and i'll build cities before i let anyone lay their hands on you again  

we'll lay foundations over the bones of the skeletons we once hid in the closet i'll make sure there are no cracks in our sidewalks so our pasts can't haunt us i'll rip the mortar from my veins as long as you provide the bricks so we can build skyscrapers that break through the earth's atmosphere maybe once we climb up we can wave and laugh at your old friends we can look the devil in the eyes and i'll be there to hold your hand when you do when you curse at him at the top of your lungs  

and if our buildings ever fall it'll be because we wanted them to we'll bury our enemies in construction so long as you promise you won't bury me too  

i don't care if your wings are broken or if your halo is a little bit rusty because at least you still have them which is more than i can say for myself  

i lost my halo while skydiving without a parachute thinking that i could fly the way i used to i didn't have the softest landing but i managed to shift my bones back into place it was a painful process but now i just need you to help me heal  

because you're the first boy i've ever met with brick hands but they're the first hands i've ever found that know how to hold me right