TANTRIC (Book 3 of the Soundcrush Series)

Chapter 3: Front Men Are In A Tough Spot

Have you noticed that Leed is sort of...a ladies man? What I mean is...he has a lot of important ladies in his life besides a love interest...his sister Mac and his long time friend and baby-mama Tam. We've already heard Mac weigh in on her opinions of Lash. I think it's time we hear from Tam...

The song for this chapter is Love Song by Sara Bareilles. The reason is...I think this could be the theme song for Leed and Tam's rather unusual arrangement. At least from Leed's perspective. I chose a relatively unknown male cover...the song starts at 0:33 if you want to skip his comments. The acoustics make the recording a bit blurry, but I really like his interpretation...there are a few pitchy places and maybe one spot where he was seeking the melody, but he does say it's a work in progress. He does a good job free-stylin' and I love the way he makes it his own, very Leed...wow I sound like a music show judge, not a writer...let's get back to the story....

Leed

"You ready for your biggest runway show ever?" I joke with Tam as we stand outside the ballroom preparing to rehearse the wedding processional. The wedding coordinator is already sending Ash down the aisle on her practice run and Tam's various sisters and cousins and Mac are lined up to follow. All of the other groomsmen went first, but I'm pulling double duty, escorting Tam down the aisle, since her dad is not doing so great, healthwise.

"Absolutely. If my water breaks when we are halfway down the aisle tomorrow, you just keep the hell going, Lee-Lee." Tamara bats her doe eyes at me. She's nine months pregnant with my kid, but she's as playful and lively as ever. Her warm skin glows with ethereal beauty and her smile is  the kind that looks like laughter, even when she's not laughing.

"You don't have to tell me the show must go on," I quip.

"Good man," she pats me and we both turn our attention to the rehearsal going on in front of us.

Ashlynn makes it to the end of the aisle, and turns. Her long hair swings slightly, and her eyes train down the aisle and automatically meet mine over the herd of bridesmaids. Tam gives me a side-eye.

"So. Big weekend for both of us, huh? I'm getting married...and you're getting a new bedbuddy, right? Or have you already sealed the deal? Be honest—is Ash woman enough to fill my bedroom slippers?"

I know Tam is partly joking—she's a fun, easy-going girl, but as I peer down at her, I feel mildly irritated. "No ma'am. It doesn't work like this. You quit me, you don't get the dirty details anymore." She used to ask me about the fangirls. Sometimes I would tell her and we would laugh over the stories.

"Wow," my beautiful baby mama looks up at me, hurt twinging her delicate features. "You're serious?" She blinks, looking away, going quiet.

Oh Christ. Now I feel terrible. The last thing I want is to make Tam upset right now. But what does she expect? Sometimes I feel like Tam is even more bizarro than me, when it comes to relationships. She wants to share a life with Ben, she wants our friendship back just like it was, without the sex. She wants us to be three equally invested, responsible parents, sharing everything, but I'm supposed to hang to the side somehow in limbo, while they make the decsions. I don't know exactly how Ben is doing it but he's handling it a lot better than me. I feel like a third wheel, with the heaviest part of the load, because I don't want to burden Ben and Tam's new marriage.

But right now is not the time to get into any of that. I relent on the line I just drew with her.

"Naw, I'm not serious. There's nothing to tell. Ashlynn...she doesn't want that. She wants...more."

Her demeanor changes. Now she is all sympathy. "Awwww, Lee-Lee. That's too bad. I'm sorry. You'll find someone else, soon. Maybe Penelope..." Tam is staring into space critically, like she's conjuring the Soundcrush PA in front of us. "What do you think about her?"