B l a c k b o y j o y

𝟬𝟭𝟭 || 𝗣𝗿𝘆𝗰𝗲

*𝘀𝗵𝗲𝘀 𝗮 𝗴𝗶𝗿𝗹*

It's not hard to find someone that tells you they love you. It's hard to find someone that really means it.

Panic. Panic is running through my body thinking of what he might like me wearing. What does he even like? I didn't even have any girly clothes to wear if we're being honest. Should I dress like his type? What even is his type? I was getting so flustered that I threw my hanger out the window. I rolled my eyes and poked my head out the window to find it.

My mother has never been the type to help me with any of this. I honestly think she was so disappointed in me that she didn't even bother asking me if I was okay. I couldn't even ask her for boy advice. This isn't really something I'm used to. I'm not used to wanting to impress a boy, I'm not used to getting butterflies in my stomach, and I'm not used to wanting someone's eyes wandering all over me.

Than I seen some red pumps clicking against the pavement. She had her white ripped up pants with her red blouse and her newly done weave.
Lady. Me and lady were very close friends. Well that was until she started doing things that god knows I wouldn't do. But she had the best advice even if you didn't think you needed it. I could use some of that advice right about now.

"Lady." She turned around and looked around until eyes landed on me. "Hey Spalding," She said smirking walking towards my window. I rolled my eyes playfully at her play of words. "You stay calling me spalding." She put her hand on her hip. "And you stay calling me lady, you don't see me complaining." I blew air out of my mouth. "You heading somewhere," I asked looking down the street. "Nah, I just came from the store. Why wassup," She asked taking her hand off of her hip. "I um, need your help with something important," I said scratching my neck. She looked around the corner and started taking off her heels. "Take my heels," She said passing them to me.

I took her heels and backed away from the window seeing her climb through. She finally got through the window and sat her purse on my bed. "So wassup," She said putting her hands on her hips. "I need you to help me pick out some clothes, for a date," I said shyly looking at the ground. I lifted my head to look at her reaction and she seemed stunned on what I said. "Like, with a boy?" I threw my arms in the air. "Yes a boy. I need help finding an outfit because he said he's taking me to the mall and I wanna look cute. So I need your help." She tapped he chin. "Who is this so called boy?" I crossed my arms and looked around the room avoiding eye contact.

"Pryce." She quickly jumped up making me step back. "You mean the basketball player Pryce? The caramel, built, head full of hair, mean ass boy at the park all the time Pryce?" I nodded my head slowly. She started smirking. "Damn sis, I didn't think you liked boys at first," She said laughing. I gave a death glare as she continued to talk. "So you must like him or something," She said looking through my clothes.

Denial. Deny as much as you can until god sews your lips shut. "Pffft. Never in a million years." She bit her lip nervously. "Cuz I was finna say there's some other girls that like him anyway." I broke my neck and looked at her. "Who?" She started laughing. "Girl I was playing. You need to stop denying your feelings. It's not gonna help in the long run," She said pulling something out of her purse. "I'm not denying my feelings, I'm just dodging the heavy hits," I said sitting in my chair.

She turned around and looked at me. "The heavy hits are the things that are gonna prepare you for life. This is just the first hit sweet heart. This hit is called feelings. You're gonna catch feelings for a lot of people in life and sometimes you're gonna drop it after you catch it, but you just can't let that prevent you from being yourself. The butterflies, the red faces, the giggles, and the smiles are just something that comes with this hit that you can't prevent. Don't try to force it or stop it. Daddy wouldn't want that for you," She said sorting out an outfit. "But what would Daddy want for you," I said walking behind her.