I'll be There

Chapter 7

Ethan's P.O.V

I'm currently sitting in the bath after letting Grayson finish undressing me which was fucking unnerving. I felt so nervous and vulnerable. Fuck. He's been so good to me this week. I trust this boy completely yet I couldn't stop shaking in front of him. Of course he fucking knew the right thing to say. Grayson always knows the right thing to say. God I love him so much.

After some time I finally felt clean so I hopped out of the bath a slipped on a new pair of sweats Grayson left for me. He asked if I needed help but not only couldn't I bear literally being bare in front of Grayson again, I found that getting dressed quickly is significantly easier than getting undressed. It hurt like hell but at least I did it on my own. Wincing, I made my way over to Graysons bed, he was laying down with books scattered everywhere fast asleep. He looked so peaceful, beautiful.. perfect. I couldn't help but stare. I knew he was completely exhausted and hadn't been getting any sleep. Because of me. I woke up every night without fail, some nights more than once screaming and crying due to flashbacks and nightmares so Grayson would spend the rest of his nights assuring me I'm okay and coaxing back to sleep. The few times where I was actually soundly sleeping I still knew Gray was up most of the night concerned about me.

I began to move the books from the bed and off of Grayson. He deserved a comfortable nights rest. Oh my god, he fell asleep with a sharp pencil in his hand. Welp that could've ended terribly. I couldn't help but look at the work, I noticed most of it was mine...he's doing my homework? For me? Wow. I couldn't be more in love with this angel. I move all the books slowly and carefully.

On my way back to Grayson's bed my mind wanders when I start to panic about all the work I've missed and have to make up and teach myself to understand and the tremendous burden I'm unfairly putting on Grayson. Grayson doesn't deserve this, he doesn't deserve me. I lay down on the bed and curl into a ball, struggling to catch my breath and unable to steady my body. I look at Grayson and I want nothing more than to be held by him currently. I think about it for just a second before I make my decision, I inched up an nestled my body into Grayson. I buried my face into his chest and inhaled deeply taking comfort in my favorite scent. Grayson. I try hard to steady my breathing. I try to do so as quietly as possible but of course I couldn't.

"Ethan?" A confused voice says quickly. "Are you ok?"
"Yeah. I'm..I'll be fine." I try to say as convincingly as possible.
"What do you need?"
"Hold me." There's a silence that falls over the room.
"Are you sure?"
"Please." I rasp out barely audible.
"Okay." He says as his arms immediately engulf me and pull me impossibly close to him but he is still so incredibly gentle.

He nestles into me and has his face in my hair inhaling my scent as if he's been thinking about doing this for a while. My body begins to relax under his embrace which Grayson seems to notice. He strokes my hair soothingly as he hums the tune to my favorite song.
He's so perfect I think, which causes me to move even closer which I thought wouldn't even be possible. It was. Tears slip from my eyes quietly but Grayson notices the moisture.

"Hey. Hey, it's okay. I'm here. Why are you crying?" I sniffle before I respond not even bothering to wipe my tears.
"It's just been a while since I felt this safe."
I felt Grayson's body tense before it melts into mine and pulls me closer to his face as he kisses the top of my head and holds his lips there for just a couple of seconds longer than usual.

"You're always safe with me Ethan."
In that moment I knew, I had absolutely no reason not to believe him.