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"Oh my God."
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"Hey, how much will you give me to eat this whole jar of olives?" Joey pulled it out of my fridge.
"I won't give you anything, but you'll owe me a jar of olives." I glanced back at him.
"Done." He closed the fridge door and took a seat next to me at the dining table.
"I need an atlas. I need an atlas." Phoebe came running into my apartment.
"Why?" I furrowed my brows in confusion. "Do you have a report due?" I joked.
"I have a date with this diplomat I met while I was giving free massages outside the UN, and I don't know where his country is." She panicked.
"Let's start with the free massages at the UN." I crossed my arms over my chest.
"Oh, it's my new thing." She brushed her hair out of her face. "I figured, 'bodies at peace make peace'." She explained her thinking.
"You might just get the first Nobel Prize in rubbing." I smiled at her.
"So what country is this guy from?" Joey questioned with a mouthful of olives.
"Um, Ichnech...traian...istan." She struggled. "There's a 'g' in there." She added.
"Where's that?" I scrunched my brows.
"In your atlas." She exclaimed.
"Pheebs, I'm sorry, but I don't have an atlas." I shook my head. "Well, wait. I do have a globe." I got up and went over to the TV station with the table.
"Hey, so, what's this guy like?" Joey inquired curiously.
"Well, he's, uh, he's very dashing, you know? And, um, very, very sophisticated. And he doesn't speak any English, but according to his translator, her really gets me." She answered.
"Okay, here you go." I went over and handed the tiny globe to her.
"What is this?" She looked up at me.
"It's a globe...and a pencil sharpener." I scratched the back of my neck.
"Oh." She closed one of her eyes and pretty much pressed the globe into her eye.
"Anybody need anything copied? I'm going down to the Xerox place." Chandler came bursting through the door.
"No thanks." I shook my head.
"Give me anything I can make two of." He begged us.
"If you don't have anything to copy, why are you going down there?" I furrowed my brows.
"Are you just going to gawk at that girl with the belly button ring again?" Joey gave him a look.
"Yeah. Do you want to come?" Chandler offered.
"Uh, no." Joey very clearly nodded his head, but his answer said the opposite.
"Joe, I can see you." I reminded him.
"Can I?" He pouted.
"Go." I rolled my eyes. The next day, Phoebe came back to Monica and Rachel's apartment to tell me and Monica all about her date with the foreign guy.
"See? There it is, right there." She was currently showing us where her new beau is from...on the tiny globe.
"Wow. It's small." Monica made a face.
"It is pretty small." I rested my chin on my hand.
"Yeah, but Sergei said it took the Germans six weeks to get all the way across it." She replied.
"Someone had fun, huh?" I nudged Phoebe's arm gently.
"Uh–huh. Except for...you know when you're on a date, and you're getting along really great, but the guy's translator keeps getting in the way?" She asked us.
"Is that what we're calling a guy's thing?" I glanced between her and Monica.
"No." Monica assured me. "And no." She answered Phoebe's question.
"Hey. Is Rach in her room?" Ross stepped into the apartment with a beautiful bouquet of flowers.
"Oh, no, she's still at work, but she told me to tell you to call her." Monica informed him.
"Since she's not here, I will gladly take the flowers you got for me." I extended my hands out to him.
"Very funny. I don't want to die in the hands of Joey." He replied sarcastically. "And she's cancelling again? How could she do this to me?" He took his coat off. "Doesn't she know it's our anniversary?" He looked so sad.
"Ross, this is the extent of my knowledge on the subject, alright?" Monica held up a purple notebook. "'Call Rachel." She showed him the message.
"What's that on the bottom?" He nodded towards it before grabbing a phone.
"That's my doodle of a ladybug with a top hat. She's fancy." Monica smiled and giggled.
"Maybe we should get you signed up for art classes." I pat my best friend's shoulder sympathetically. "Shoot, I have to go make cookies." I checked the time.
"For what?" Phoebe looked up at me as I got ready to leave.
"I was craving oatmeal chocolate chip cookies, so I'm going to make some with little chunks of white chocolate." I answered before waving at them and heading out the door. In my apartment, I saw Joey with my little apron on and mixing some batter in a bowl.
"Hey, I was making some cookies." He greeted me with a peck on th lips as he continued to miix.
"Did you add—" I looked into the bowl.
"White chocolate chips? Yes, I did." He finished for me.
"Really? Best boyfriend ever!" I cheered. After helping him make little cookies bowls and putting them into the oven, I dragged him over to the couch. We kind of just sat there. "How did you know I wanted white chocolate chips instead of regular chocolate?" I looked over at him.
"It's kind of like twin telepathy for soulmates." He smiled sweetly at me.
"Oh, you know me so well." I rolled onto his lap so that I was straddling him.
"And you know me way too well." He chuckled and pulled me down for a kiss. After a bit of that, we ordered some Chinese and took the cookies out before sitting down to eat at the dining table.
"I want to get married." I blurted out. The way his eyes widened in surprise made me regret saying anything. "I–I am so so—" I was about to apologize.
"No, no. That's okay. That's...it's more than okay. It's great." He quickly stood up. "Do you want to get married now or something?" He took a step back.
"Joey, no." I chuckled at his impatience. "I think... let's wait for our third anniversary." I suggested.
"We'll throw the biggest and best wedding ever." He took my face into his hands and kissed me passionately. "Did you want to have a kid too?" He was about to take his shirt off.
"A little further down the line, babe." I answered. "But we'll get there. We're going to get there so fast, you're not even going to realize it. We'll get there." I held one of his hands in both of mine.
"I love you. God, I love you so much." He kissed the top of my hand before moving on to my lips.
