Shards of Sanity (Book 6, Forgotten Series)

Chapter Twenty-Three

It was Friday and I had nearly been crawling out of my skin with excitement since I had woken up. I hadn't even been too bothered by the harshness of the bedroom lights that had pulled me from my slumber. Lilith had gotten up before me and had turned all of them on. She hadn't been in bed which had concerned me but then I had found her in the bathroom. She had been perched on the vanity, combing and trimming the ends of her hair with scissors. I had bit my tongue about her cutting her own hair and had done my best to ignore it. Although I had given her an incredulous look when she had asked me if she could cut mine. I half wondered if she even wanted too or just liked to giggle at me when I made a face at her for asking.

She was in therapy for the time being though. May had asked for a longer session and Lilith had grumbled about it, scrunching her face right up like a little old lady and it had taken all I had to not laugh at her for it. However she had brightened up when May explained it was a group session. She wanted to see how Lilith interacted with Ainsley, Shey, and Heidi all together as a group. Lilith didn't open up much and May was trying to see if a close group of females would work as enough of a support system that she would be able to open up or even if a group would be enough to help her draw out of her loops without her shutting down completely.

I gave a small sigh as I started up the stairs. She was trying, she was, but I was beginning to wonder if she would always been like she was. It wasn't a bad thing but I didn't like to see her get stuck in a loop where she was back with Adam and she could do nothing but shiver and stammer. Those moments terrified her and she wasn't never really quite right mentally after them and it took her several days to come out of the after effects. She would pick at her nails until they bled and she would flinch at anyone who even looked at her. It was hard for me to see and I had hoped that she would be able to progress to the point where it wouldn't be as bad. However I also knew that if she didn't, I would accept that as how it would be.

I just hoped that the group sessions would help her out, even just the tiniest bit. Each step forward she made was something to celebrate, no matter how small of a step it seemed to be. I ran my hand through my hair and hit the second floor, heading for the office. I was getting a bit too jittery about today. My family was coming and I wanted to know everything but there had been a bit of radio silence. I tried not to let it bother me but after talking to my parents that first phone call and then again every single day afterwards, I didn't like not knowing what was going on. Granted I figured they probably felt the same way after the hiatus I took but I tried not to let the guilt eat at my stomach too much. I already had too much of that as it was.

Speaking to May hadn't really done much of anything to alleviate the guilt I felt about my situation with Lilith in the afterlife. I knew it seemed like a very ridiculous thing to feel guilty for but I couldn't help it. I wanted to be there for her but I had a very heavy feeling in my stomach that I wouldn't. I just couldn't turn my back on Catherine and Bethany, I couldn't even bring myself to think about it, let alone do it. I rubbed at my stomach with a grimace, trying to force the thoughts away, there was no reason for me to make myself sick over it and I was simply pushing it away as best as I could. I knew I would end up obsessing over it if I wasn't careful and that was something that didn't help anyone.

I pushed open the office door and to my surprise, Ezekiel was laying on the couch shifted to skin. He lifted his head from his spot on the couch as he glanced at me before made a face and laid his head back down. "Well it's difficult, Kiel, I can't really explain these things to strangets who arrive on pack territory. 'Hey, yah. I'm not the firstborn Alpha son but can you lay off cause my kid just died?' It's not something that should be tossed out there." Luka was talking into his hands and Ezekiel gestured towards the desk as he huffed, looking decidedly put out.