Rayston Point Road || Editing

Epilogue

It was early, too early for most to be awake, even those who had set their alarms after the weekend, a reminder of Monday morning and the first of a new month. The July heat was already raging, a heat wave arriving with the official start of summer the week prior, the dawn of a new day and a new month. Even with the sun barely breaking over the horizon, my t-shirt was threatening to stick uncomfortably against my back as I leaned forward in the seat of my car, cranking my keys until it roared to life underneath me.

The last eight days had passed by in a blur, a mix of torrential rain and thunders that coincided with the vicious fight I had with Leighton last Sunday morning when I finally returned from Isaac's house, combined with the stifling heat that only added to the tension that exploded with the arrival of my mother and other family for the twin's birthday.

We barely pulled ourselves together for the party a few days ago, obligatory smiles for photos and forced conversations to alleviate any gossip from the guests that my family was on the verge of imploding. Only a few outsiders knew of the tension I carried in my shoulders and the shake of my hands that I hadn't been able to quell all week- Andie, who stopped by with an impeccably wrapped gift, Connor, and, to my panic, Isaac, in tow. She had shot me a sympathetic look when he trailed in behind her, texting me later that he had found out from Connor that they were coming and asked to tag along.

He had been hoping to surprise me, and it was almost too much to bear, with everything else going on, to feign excitement to see him and sit so close next to him, while knowing what was going to happen next. It was enough that I didn't even feel any relief when he left for a shift at work, only regret gnawing away at my stomach and heart.

That feeling lingered over the next few days. Even as the dust settled around my family, as Leighton and I worked ourselves to a better place, a place where she understood me and believed what I was telling her, and where I believed that she truly understood the truth, as my mother and I landed somewhere in the middle of what our relationship had become and what it had once been. That was likely the closest we would ever come to normal, but it was enough that I knew returning to New York, even just briefly to pack up my room and the house to move my things into an apartment with Bailee, would be bearable.

And on this morning, of a new month and a new days, that's where I was heading. Leighton and Dan were standing on the porch, leaning into each other and waving at me with exhausted expressions as I pulled out of the driveway. I watched them through my rearview mirror as I came to a stop at the intersection of Rayston Point Road, looking up and down the stretch of gravel multiple times, despite no other cars being present at this time.

My last memory of Isaac, his ridiculous smile as he said something flirtatious and mildly inappropriate before climbing into his Jeep a few days ago, leaving for with the impression that we were on good terms, but he may not hear from me as I tried to sort through my problems with my family. He still had no idea I was leaving so soon, and wouldn't, not at least for a few more hours, until I was well on my way out of the state. Then he would inevitably wake to the letter I had left with Andie to give him, a futile attempt to explain why I left the way I did, although I knew that any words I wrote to him would rectify the situation, or make either of us okay.

Still, it was all that I had the courage for, and if I had tried to face him, I'm not sure I would have made it out of Rayston, when that was what I knew I needed, what I had decided on weeks ago while sitting in Andie's car outside the trail to the marshes in the pouring rain.

As much as I wanted to turn right, find my way to his house and let him convince me to stay, I turned the opposite way. I needed to go home, back to New York and to Columbia, where I could continue to pick up the pieces of the mess that had been left behind since that night with Nolan and Wes. And I couldn't do that in Rayston, as much as I wanted to.