Life and Death-1

Heartbreak

Who would you like to be your attending? Cristina, Meredith, Alex, McDreamy, McSteamy, or Hunt?

We eventually get him down to trauma for an ortho doctor to treat him. "You want to tell me what's having you so down?" Alex sneaks up on me.

"I..."

"I heard you talking to Mer about your life-sucking. Want to talk about it."

"I have a..."

"Gen." I completely break down and people stare and Alex is kind enough to lead us into a quiet room where I can have my life fall apart in private.

"I...he's here and I...Alex he's here and I..."

"Gen calm down. Who's here?" Alex hands me tissues and the room feels so hot from all of my crying and hyperventilating.

"Mark Sloan."

"Wait so you and that plastics guy are...you are a thing?"

"No..." I finally calm down enough that I don't only hear the ringing in my ears. "I met him during my last year of medical school when I observed him for my plastics rotation. He..."

"You can tell me and I won't judge you." I raise my brow at him. Alex sits down next to me and we sit there in silence for a moment. "I know I'm not the warm fuzzy kind of guy but with you, I'll be the shoulder you want to cry on. A punching bag. Therapist. Anything that helps you get through this life. I am here for you Gen until the end." My mouth hangs open as I to process this information. Alex and I have been friends but we've never said how deep our friendship will be.

"Mark was the father of the baby I lost."

"Oh shit." I nod my head.

"I...I met him during my last year of medical school at Columbia when I was doing my plastics rotation. He hates teaching but I was the only medical student let alone person there who could keep up with his knowledge. I challenged him and we formed this friendship. He was what you are saying to me now. He was my friend who I could tell anything to because...we understood each other and..."

"Do I need to kick his ass? Because I will kick his ass no matter what it does for my future!" I place my hand on Alex's shoulder keeping him from getting up.

"You don't need to kick his ass...well not yet." I smile at him.

"Did he know?"

"I tried to tell him when I knew for sure I was pregnant but...he ended our relationship saying it was nothing more than a distraction for him. He said I was something to keep his mind off the woman he actually loved."

"And you never told the guy he was going to be a father?"

"In some women, they show no signs of being pregnant and that was the case for me. I was well into my first trimester when I found out I was pregnant. I haven't had normal periods for years so I thought nothing of it when I missed my last cycle. I didn't gain any weight and I had no symptoms. It wasn't until I passed out during my first surgery as an intern in New York did I know I was pregnant."

"You passed out? Wait you were an intern before?"

"For only a month. I..." I look Alex in the eyes. "I passed out because the smell of the O.R. disgusted me to the point I felt lightheaded and saw nothing but stars as I fell down on my own attending. They ran some tests and..."

"Was it similar to what happened to Yang?"

"Somewhat except I was miscarrying. I just had extreme sensitivity to the chemical smell of the room. I...I was shocked and concerned all at the same time."