Queen Quinn

5

Kellin gets on his phone pressing buttons and then I see the hall lights go off.

"I have an app that I can control everything in my house with, it's so cool. I'm turning on the heater," he informs me and puts his phone down.

I wish I grew up in a house like this, it seems so cool. He doesn't have to worry about wasting food or anything financially. One thing I like about him is he doesn't act super spoiled. Yes he seems like he usually gets what he wants but he has manners.

He waits for me to start eating before he does. He apologizes if he things he did something wrong. Cleans up after himself. He just seems mature except for being scared of silly things.

"Sit with me?" He asks getting on the bed full of blankets and pillows, it reminds me of a nest. I go over to him and get into the nest with him.

"Okay.. so you want to know why I'm so scared, Why I have scars, why I'm the way I am right? Is there anything else?" He says and looks at me nervously.

I think about it and I think of a few questions but shake my head no. I'll ask later when everything is relevant.

"Okay.. well, when I was a little my mom and dad would.. hurt me. It was simple stuff like hard spankings that left bruises, constantly being grounded, and locked in closets and stuff. It was okay, I was okay." He stops and looks up from his hands to see my face. I put my hand on his thigh in a comforting manner.

"When I got older it got worse, they didn't feed me everyday because they said I was fat. They told me to kill myself, they told me how teenagers would cut themselves when they were sad.. she- she said I should cut," he looks at his wrists and tears fall.

My heart clinches at the things he's saying. "My mom was mad that I didn't want to cut myself so she tied me down and cut me.. she did that a lot. Our house was small and old. My room, the garage, would leak when it rained and thunder would bang so loud I would think someone was shooting a gun. My sister had her own room, she was treated better," he wipes some tears away and breathes a little.

I lean in and kiss his forehead and give him a smile. I'm not going to interrupt or ask questions until he's done.

"My sister was two years older than me so I looked up to her, she's my roll model.. I stole some of her clothes.. when I thought my parents were gone I tried them on. I felt pretty.. but my dad walked in on me. He burned my thighs for it.. the scars on my back were from my mom.. she was tripping on meth or something and she wanted to make me have a tramp stamp because she found out I was a whore," he wipes his face more and closes his eyes.

I rub his leg and sit in silence as he calms himself down before continuing. This must be really hard to talk about. I appreciate him opening up to me.

"Anyways, someone found out what happened at my house and I got put into foster homes. It was hard to find a home.. nobody wanted me. But the other boys there were cool, well not really but Justin, Tony, Jake, and Gabe were my friends. They helped me.. Danny was there.. he liked me and I liked him so we became a couple.. he would hit me and call me names but I was use to it.. I didnt complain. He was really nice after hurting me. But he raped me.. he did it a lot and convinced me that I liked it after a while.. but he took things to far and I broke up with him. I grew scared of everything, everything is scary. Being in the dark makes me panic because I feel like I'm locked somewhere that my parents put me.. thunder.. thunder sounds like gunshots, I watched someone murder someone and then kill themself.. it was thundering and and, I it's just a bad memory. I wasnt close to either of the two who died that day so it really was the fact that I saw that," he says surprisingly not breaking down to much. He is crying but not hard.