Fix You (Another Genderbend One Shot involving Stephanie (Female!Steve) and The Winter Soldier
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"You know me." I yelled. Anger flashed across his face.
"No I don't!" He responded. Would everything really end like this?
"I'm not going to fight you..." I said, dropping his shield. "Your name is James Buchanan Barnes..."
"Shut up!" He screamed, hitting me. The force of the blows would have sent anyone else to the floor. But not me- because of that dammed serum I was stronger than the man I'd looked to for protection for so many years.
"You're my friend..." My voice was almost pleading, and he hesitated. Like the girl he thought I was, was more than just his mission.
"You're my mission!" He yelled. He attacked me again, his metal prosthetic connecting with my skin more than once or twice. I didn't count, it hurt me less if I didn't.
Soon, I, the 'famed' Captain Stephanie Grace Rogers, was beaten black and blue and bloody by my own best friend.
"Then finish it... because I'm with you til the end of the line..." I choked out. He raised his fist to hit me again and something inside me broke. "Please Bucky. You know me." I cried. "Don't do this. Please don't do this."
It wasn't as if I expected my plea to change anything. Hydra had torn the old Bucky apart, ripped away who he was and replaced him with a cold hearted killer. I just couldn't stop myself from begging him to ignore his orders.
"You don't have to do this. You don't have to listen to them. We can- we can go back to S.H.I.E.L.D. and figure out how to get your memory back and- and-" I let out a sob, feeling like my chest was on fire because no matter how hard I tried I couldn't stop the tears. I couldn't stop the overwhelming fear that my best friend, the man I'd grown up with and fought with during the war, was about to kill me. But I knew I had to accept it. I knew I couldn't save myself, not when he didn't recognize me.
"Shut up!" He screamed again, bringing his fist down. Pain exploded in my mind, leaving me numb and oddly cold. I didn't dare move my head, realizing my neck was probably broken.
"It's okay." I coughed. "It's okay Bucky."
That's what sent him over the edge. Not my endless pleading, not my refusal to kill him so he wouldn't kill me. Me being okay with the fact that I was going to die at the hands of my right hand man. He screamed, reminding me of when he fell off that damn train because I couldn't reach him.
'This was all my fault.' I thought numbly. 'If I had caught him he wouldn't be like this. He'd be old and married and have grandkids and all his memories. Not a shell of his former self...'
"Steph?" A hoarse voice whimpered. My immediate reaction was to move closer to the source, which jostled my neck and made me cry out in pain and bright white lights flashed across my vision. "Oh god, Stephanie."
"It's- okay-" I mumbled, reaching blindly for Bucky's hand. The irony was cruel and painful. He remembered me now, when I was dying. Cold hands found their way to my neck and carefully twisted my head so the damaged vertebra weren't screaming with torturous pain.
"I'll fix this. I'll call Howard-" Bucky swore, cutting himself off as he realized Howard wasn't in this decade with us. "Tell me who to call. Tell me how to get help." He pleaded.
"Stephanie?" Asked the familiar voice of Sam Wilson. "Where are you Steph? I'll come get you."
I reached up, pain exploding in my mind again, and struggled with my ear piece. "Tell Sam we're on the hellicarrier." I told Bucky. "He'll come get us."
Blackness was edging into my vision, probably had been for a while. I wanted to cry when I realized that by the time Sam got here I'd probably be dead. My time was up.
Paying no attention to what Bucky was saying, I grabbed his collar and pulled him towards me then kissed him.
'I waited so long to do this...' I thought sadly. As Bucky pulled away I whispered three words to him that I thought I'd never have the guts to say.
"I love you..."
Lights will guide you home
And ignite you bones
And I will try to fix you
