"It's A Reasonably Bearable Existence..."

"It's a Reasonably Bearable Existence..." Part X...

"It's a Reasonably Bearable Existence..."

Summary: The Powers That Be have had it with Sheldon...And have decided he needs a little Xmas...

Disclaimer: It's all Chuck's...But nothing for Joss Whedon on this one.

(Just a note...To learn more about Amy's rather bipolar, beautiful, and somewhat tragic sister and her Sheldon Cooper obsession, you'll want to read "Gran Mag")

Part X...

"Now you guys..." Alix, phone closed, reproving frown at the line of sour-faced cats... "There'd be no fancy feast without Dr. Cooper, so lets remember it's Christmas Day and hope he and his friends have a nice holiday...Especially that sweet Leonard and nice Dr. Fowler..."

(Well...? Sheldon, smug look... "I see no problems here...Indeed I seem a positive force in someone's life..."

Penelope, eye roll... "The woman is defending you to cats, Sheldon...And you've encouraged her to pursue fantasies of your best friend..."

"What?..."

"You tole her Penny wasn't sure about continuing with Leonard, when any idiot could've seen the poor lamb has herself a burning coal in her fireplace for the boy..."

"I never encouraged her..."

"Sheldon, you forget I have more access to you and your thoughts than you'd care admit...You deliberately encouraged that poor lonely girl because you're jealous of easily Leonard handles his relationships and of how Amy sees him succeeding in doing all the things for Penny which she longs for you to do for her..."

"Jealous?...Oh, pshaw...Leonard's managed some minor bedroom tactics, I grant you...But..."

"I'm not talking about relations that way, Master Cooper...I mean that Leonard has not had any problem telling Mistress Penny that he loves her..."

"Fat lot of good that did him..." Sheldon noted, with frown...

"So you admit it..."

"I just mean...Getting all 'love you, marry me' and physical didn't make any easier for him...Penny is still rejecting him..."

"She hasn't rejected him, the lass is just 'uncertain'...It took five proposals by Claire to wear me down..."

"And you're saying I deliberately set Alix at him...?"

"Not consciously...But more or less, yes...You're trying to show Amy Leonard's not as perfect as a lover in the matters of spirit as she thinks...You are jealous of your friend, Sheldon...And jealously fearful of losing him, the one person besides Amy who has been willing to try and understand you freely...All the others, even my descendant, Mistress Penny, required you making an effort to prove yourself, however feeble...But not Leonard and not Amy...They opened their hearts to you immediately, saw something worthy in you, your best parts...Now as you fail Amy, you want Leonard to be deprived of his real chance for happiness as well so he won't leave you all alone..."

"I told him I wouldn't go to Christmas Day dinner, hardly the act of a man who doesn't want the invitor to abandon him..." Sheldon, insistent...

"Abandon, eh?..." shrewd look...

"I mean...Uh..."

"That wedding night with poor Amy he treated her as you should've...And you know and knew it then...And you're jealous...Not that Leonard might take her from you...Though that thought has crossed your consciousness...They would be a good match..."

"They most certainly would not...And it has not...Much...Besides, I staked my position as Amy's alpha male with a judo chop...I was very clear, no need of such shenanigans..."

"As I say, it's not the physical you fear, Master Cooper...Well, not the physical from Leonard's point of view..."

"What's that supposed to mean?..." anxious look...

"You think I don't know what happened?..." stare... "Sheldon, I've been watching you for a while..."

"What, there's no supernatural restrictions on surveillance ?"

"You ever hear tell otherwise, sir?..."

"It was a mistake...I was just..."

"Yes...So you told Amy...And have been doing your insensitive, yet desperate best to go on telling her...While, in the meantime...The poor girl has had something to tell you...Which you already know, don't you?..." frown...

"I don't want to talk about this...Where's Amy?...There's no point in our being here...Alix is just my assistant..."

"There's every point, Sheldon...This girl is someone you're responsible for...Someone a man like Leonard would try to encourage and help...Instead, Master Cooper, you not only don't help her, you use her to ensure Amy has no one she might turn to in her hour of need...Least of all, you..."

"Meemaw had just...It wasn't my fault..." he paced the room...Stepping through Alix and her sofa...

"That's very disconcerting that I can do that...Can't you make that stop?..."

"Sheldon...Amy's waited so long...And finally...Finally...She thought you were turning to her...And you were, but so soon as you feared it might mean you'd have to give back instead of taking...Now that you have to face a commitment..."

"I committed to the Relationship Agreement...Why couldn't she've been happy with that?..."

Smile, shaking of head...Stare... "Because you clearly weren't...")

"Maybe I could call Leonard later and see if he'd be willing to help me with some of this...He's very sympathetic about Dr. Cooper's demands on me..." Alix eyed Martha who licked a paw with a slightly sour look...

"Don't look at me that way...Martha...It's Christmas...I'd just like to see him..."

("What is that?..." Sheldon stared, looking round...

"The Dark One's...What is his name?...Ah, Darth Vader...His song from "Star Wars"...Very foreboding, 'tisn't?..."

"Bit clichéd, I'd say...So this is some sort of fatal romance turning point here...?"

"Alix will invite Leonard over...He will come, wanting to make up for your behavior and guessing how lonely she is...She'll tell him what you told her Penny said...A desperate attempt to win him...He won't believe it but when he confronts Penny and she panics...Feeling trapped..."

"Well...They've had that happen before...A few months, a year..."

"Your second best, non-girlfriend, friend and my descendent Penny, who did so much to help you and Amy, will kill herself in six months over losing Leonard...In a car 'accident' that will be quickly proven not so..." Penelope eyed him... "Leonard will marry Alix but he'll blame her for what then happened...Not consciously but...Three more lives destroyed, thanks very much..."

"Penny?...Kill herself over Leonard?...Please..."

"That's exactly the remark you'll make that will push her over the edge...And you'll mean to hurt her...Because of Amy and your need to strike back at your friends for not saving her from you..."

"Amy?...No..."

"We have to see more...Come on..." she frowned at him... "You wanted to leave, now lets go..." she pulled at him...He jerked back...

"No!...If you're Amy's guardian, why didn't you protect her?!...Why didn't you stop me from...Whatever?...Why are you helping me and not her?..."

"Perhaps I'm doing that right now, laddie..." she eyed him..."And whoever said I was helping you...?")