Feelings

Chapter 8

The physical therapists arrived bright and early the next morning, much to Lim's dismay. Oh sure she knew very well that walking as soon as possible would aid her in her recovery, but these therapists were a little too cheerful. And quite frankly, it was embarrassing to go from one of the most respected surgeons at St. Bonaventure to a patient in the blink of an eye. At least Melendez would be right by her side. Or so she thought.

She noticed it was nearly 9:00 and he still hadn't stopped by that morning. She turned to one of the nurses, Carrie, and asked, "Carrie, do you know where Dr. Melendez is?" Lim asked quietly.

"I believe he's in the OR," answered Carrie, "He had to perform an emergency surgery."

"Oh," Lim responded understandingly, though she was slightly disappointed.

"I'm sure Dr. Melendez will be by when he's finished but for right now, we really need to get you walking. I'm sure I don't have to explain all of the medical reasons why," said Carrie.

Lim shook her head, "No, you don't."

Carrie and the physical therapist, Matt, made sure to disconnect monitors and move IV stands before helping Lim attempt to sit up. She regularly rode a motorcycle to work (at least until her motorcycle license had been suspended), she was the first in line for the latest thrill ride at Disneyland; she thrived on a good adrenaline rush. But now, everything was different. Now, it took all she could to stand without collapsing she felt so weak in the knees, it took all she could not to vomit because of the amount of drugs in her system, she became short of breath just taking a stroll around the main desk in the ICU. She also had another round of lung function tests and, although the results were better than they were just days ago, the outcome still wasn't great. In between tests and walking sessions, Lim really didn't have much else to do other than read or watch TV, so she had a lot of time on her hands to think about things. All she had wanted that morning was to be close to Melendez, but why? It's not like she ever thought about him that much before a few weeks ago. Okay, maybe she had, but it wasn't romantically; it was more competitively over the Chief of Surgery position. Or maybe she occasionally thought about him romantically, but it was deep down. Way deep down. Practically non-existent. He had been engaged earlier this year. No, she didn't really want to date him. She wasn't falling for him. The sex was just stress release as a result of being angry about Andrews's decision. Nothing more. That was what all of the rationalizations had been about when they woke up the next morning.

But now, everything had changed. She would never admit it to anyone, but she had been petrified when she had seen the rash on her arm. She immediately locked herself away in isolation to protect Morgan from infection but she had wanted nothing more than for someone to comfort her the moment she had found out the deadly virus was attacking her body. Her first thought had been, "Am I going to die?" She probably had at one point given the fact that she had woken up with a tube down her throat. And while both Shaun and Morgan were growing into excellent surgeons, they were both still learning. She knew that Shaun had been overwhelmed by the chaos in the ER and she knew that Morgan had been distraught over Tyler's death and probably had been after she had collapsed. But they had helped save her because Dr. Neil Melendez had come to their (and her) rescue. Never mind the fact that they had been set against each other for a promotion just days beforehand, never mind the fact that she had brushed off the sex as being casual and meaning nothing (because it didn't, truly). He had seen her in trouble and nothing else had mattered to him. Quite frankly, if there hadn't been security guards protecting the quarantine area, he probably would've broken the windows and run into isolation unexposed if it meant saving her. Because in the end, they were friends who were always there for each other, no matter the circumstances. Dammit, she was beginning to like him in that manner and was starting to imagine a future with him as more than friends. But she could never tell Melendez. He probably didn't feel the same way about her. He was too professional for that sort of thing.