the suicide mind

old friends

marcos and jayden
when i first saw you guys i thought you guys were twins but you are cousins. i never thought cousins could look so much alike. you guys are the craziest kids i know and i know i haven't seen you in like 2 years but i love you.
wilson
i never liked you. i hated you but we started talking and i thought you were cool kid. you may act tough all the time but i know there's a soft spot in you. stay poppin brotha love ya
sylvia
you were the bestest friend anybody could have. even when i was in the worst mood you always tried to make me smile. even though i'm a month older you were like big sister to me. you were the only one to hold me back up and not think i was ugly. they used to call me ugly all the time but you were the one to not think that. i love you so much. stay fierce baby girl
jacob
there's actually nothing to say. we been through shitty times but we gone through them. i still remember that time when i fell and you were the one to help me up. i still remember when we met. it may be 5 years ago but it was good year. i haven't seen you in like 2 years but i never get you off my mind. your just always there. i remember when you used to joke around with me but i tooked it seriously. in 2011 my parents were fighting and i went outside to just think you came out and you asked me if i was okay i said yea. but i knew and you knew i wasn't okay. we were weird. just weird. but i still love you always have and always will.
mia
mia we probably almost died because of the things we used to do but we were young anyways, people used to say stuff behind your backs but you were strong through the whole thing. you were brave and i didn't think you would have been so strong. i really do love you mia. keep your head up girl.
sandrell and sullick
the brother and sister. i never thought a brother and sister relationship could be so close. you guys were like twins. we used to go to the pool and do tricks and all of that but everything changed.
you see i had a good life. a lot of friends back then my parents were fighting but 2011 around November everything changed. i lost contact with half the people here. we grew up went our separate ways. we are going through tough stages. i never thought i would be a suicidal girl. i never thought i would cut myself so deep than i have . i never thought i could feel so much pain in my life. i had my dad and my mom to be there for me but now i have a mom just a mom . half my childhood i didn't have dad. you know what they say a daughter needs her father but i didn't have him when i needed him i had my mom. my mom is to be honest the strongest people i know. she went through heartbreak and death. she stayed strong for me and sister. my sister is the definition of perfect. she's 19 in college.shes had a father more than me. when my parents divorced she was 17 i was young. i didn't want my family to break apart. but you know what it did. people probably think i have the greatest life ever but i don't. i've never cried so much in my life. November really isn't a good month for me because everything just starts to break apart.
life isn't easy you just have to go through it to overcome it