PART ONE | Upside Down

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❛ I IMAGINED DEATH SO MUCH IT FELT LIKE A MEMORY

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I IMAGINED DEATH SO MUCH IT FELT LIKE A MEMORY. 
Is this where it really gets me?

When you live in my shoes and see the world through my eyes, you have to acquaint yourself with the possibility of every day being your last.

I imagined many scenarios. 

Perhaps, the enemy would be several feet away from me, weapon in his hand... and I would be shot. I could bleed to death. My neck could be snapped. My soul could be crushed. With the work that I did, I could have been crushed by a building, possessed by a demon, suffocated in the cosmos, or burned by the sun.

I imagined many scenarios, but what had become of my death was not one of them.

I sacrificed myself— my life, my soul, and my legacy for my friends and my family, but they would never know.

They would not even remember me. The timeline would be reset, and all the memories we created, the laughs we shared, and the challenges we overcame would be erased. The story we wrote together would be permanently wiped from the universe. My existence would be wiped from the cosmos, my soul completely redacted from the narrative.

The Gotham Archer was never a myth.

The Legend was never a hero.

But my family would be safe. They could rebuild their lives and enjoy it all over again without the fear of an apocalypse. They would be happy again... even if I am longer in their lives.

This is what being a hero is about. You fought not for the glory, but for the people you were protecting.

That is what being a hero is about. 

Right?

But I was not just a hero.

I was a daughter and a sister. I was a friend, and I was a lover. I had a family, a husband— the kind of love I never believed I deserved. I had all of these people who kept me strong and all these reasons that kept me going.

I fought through the night. I fought to live another day. I fought for them. 

They were worth every price to pay— a broken heart, an empty soul, a hollow being, or even an entire lifetime erased from reality...

They were— are worth the sacrifice.
but when my world turns upside down,
when my family is no longer around,
and I am left paying the price,
am I wrong to rethink my choice?

Brooklyn Natalie

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