Don't Write Me Off

3. erika - doesn't mean we shouldn't try

 I sent Jasper a friend request on Facebook, finally, since I feel like after our lunch yesterday it's no longer inappropriate to. We agreed to exchange schedules but since I was preoccupied with school today, I wasn't able to get around to doing it. I'm about to sleep when I get a notification saying that he accepted my request, and a few seconds later a message from him pops up.

Jasper Dale De Jesus sent you a message

1:05AM

Jasper Dale De Jesus

You know, you wouldn't need all that coffee if you actually slept on time.

I blow a raspberry, typing out a quick reply.

1:07AM

Erika Jade Gonzales

Speak for yourself. I was about to sleep, until you messaged. See you tomorrow? We still have to discuss the schedule, in case you forget. I'll text you.

He sends a thumbs up and a few laughing emojis. I turn in before I am tempted to reply. I fight the urge to see how Gab is doing, or to turn on my laptop to watch another episode of FRIENDS or two. I am going to try harder to break out of the habit. Since, after all, I am getting better.

I think.

---

"You're actually meeting up with him later?" Paula laughs at my news, but then she pulls me into a hug to let me know how exciting it is for her to see that her crazy idea seems to be working. I pull away, smiling, "Yeah, yeah, don't think too much of it."

"How was he, was he nice? He's cute, right? I remember!" she sits down next to me, her body turned towards my direction, and it's clear that she's not getting over the news any time soon. I shrug, trying to lower her expectations, "Well, he wanted to help out, at least."

Paula snickers, "I'm actually surprised you don't remember him. He was with you-know-who last year when we went to Walrus."

I narrow my eyes at her, "Who?"

"Gab!"

"Oh," I reply, perplexed.

"He was with their group that night. Honestly, Erika, you were so out of it, that's why you probably didn't notice him."

The news takes a while to register, "He's a friend of Gab's?"

"His childhood best friend, I think...okay, no, actually I know. I stalked them both on Facebook when I saw a photo from that night. Gab never talked about him to you?"

I sit still for a while, trying to rack up my brain for anything that Gab might have told me then. I only met his college friends, and I think he might have mentioned Jasper from his high school days, but I never really paid attention. "I mean, I guess Gab did mention something about a childhood friend in UP, but he didn't really go into detail."

Paula rolls her eyes, "Obviously, or else you would have ended up with the more gorgeous one instead of the troll--"

"Paula!"

"What?!" she protests, "I still hate the guy! Anyway, it doesn't matter. They don't seem that close anyway. Jasper would have known about you by now."

I don't know whether to be hurt or relieved that Gab's suspected childhood best friend doesn't seem to know me at all. Hurt, because it makes me feel like I wasn't taken seriously by Gab when we were together, and relieved because I think it would be easier to study with Jasper if he didn't feel that our arrangement is awkward. Okay, more than it already is, because hanging out with a friend's ex-girlfriend isn't exactly ideal.