By your window

10.

WARNINGS: Hints of toxic masculinity, mentions of violation of privacy and general angst.

Marben jumped at a sudden, crackling sound and a bluish glow: she spun around with a yelp, fearing some short circuit in the electrical system, and gave a little cry when she saw a pristine looking Five standing in the middle of her dorm room while she was already in her pajamas.
"FUCK ME! It's you!". Five gave her a lopsided smirk.
"Oh, how I love it, when you say dirty things to me".
"FIVE HARGREEVES, YOU IMPOSSIBLE GIT!" bellowed Marben, flushing bright red and throwing a pillow at the boy's face; Five ducked, laughing out loud.
"Is this the way to greet your boyfriend? Come on, Doll, where's my kiss?". Marben went to him sort of shyly; she gave him the sweetest kiss, but he still could sense something was off.
"Hey" Five said softly then, breaking the kiss, "Is everything alright?".
"I got scared" she reluctantly admitted with a pout. "And then realized it was nothing, and got angry at myself. Sorry, babe, don't mind me".
Before Five could tell anything, she took his hand and guided him toward her bed, offering him a place to seat. The boy let himself fall on the mattress with a light bounce.
"I'm glad you're here. I missed you" whispered Marben leaning down for a peck.
"Already?".
"Yes. I always miss you, when you're away".
Five grabbed her by a wrist and dragged her down on the bed; she fell beside him with a small cry which immediately morphed into a laugh, and together they flipped over, landing on their backs. Marben straightaway groped for one of Five's hands and snuggled against his shoulder, as by then was her custom.
For a bit they stayed like that, their furious heartbeats rumbling in their ears while they basked in the pure, gentle elation of feeling comfortable with each other without having to utter a word. Five needed the peace Marben's presence provided like air, and Marben was irredeemably addicted to the clumsy sweetness she knew he reserved only for her. That was what brought a sudden question to her lips.

"I would never have believed you a softie, when we met: are you this affectionate with your siblings too?". That made Five sputter.
"A...a softie? ME?".
"Yes, you. As in tender-hearted, gentle" fluted Marben with a smile; above her, Five's face was getting stonier by the second. "Five? You okay?".
"I...I absolutely am not like that".
"Babe, we're not doing much else than cuddling and snogging, lately" said the girl, matter of factly. "And there's nothing wrong with it. I love it, in fact".
Five stayed silent and rigid. Marben could sense his internal struggle against himself by touch alone: she didn't need to be told this was something related to how Five had been raised and how toxic things were in his household. She just knew. And all of a sudden the need of always having to carefully choose her own words around him felt suffocating, to her. They hadn't even properly defined their relationship yet, but Five had already shut her off in at least three different occasions. She was getting fed up with this mysterious Umbrella Academy which prevented her from getting truly close to her boyfriend, from helping him through difficulties.
"Fine. Let's just pretend I didn't say anything".

Swiftly, Marben left his hand and stood up; she picked up her violin and bow, checked the mute was firmly secured to the strings and started playing what was written on the first staff that caught her eye, stubbornly facing the music stand.
Behind her, an evenly confused, mad and sheepish Five sat up too, running a hand through his now tousled hair.

"I know there's nothing wrong with being affectionate, Marben" he said seriously, and hearing him say her given name was scary, but she didn't relent in any way. "It's just I've been taught it's a waste of time. I'm not used to intimacy".
"And yet when we makeout it seems to come naturally to you. Five".
"Don't do this" Five sharply replied. "Tonight was turning out just fine, why do you want to spoil it?".
Marben stopped her playing abruptly, tearing the bow from the strings with such indignation it produced a screech, and spun to look at Five.
"I looked up information on your family, at the Library" she said dryly; Five looked gobsmacked.
"It...it wasn't...you shouldn't ha...".
"WHY? You're famous, your life is displayed by television and papers for everyone to see, BUT I DON'T GET TO KNOW ANYTHING OF IT! And I just want to know who you are!" Marben exploded, raising her voice. "You keep coming and going, I see you everywhere and every single time you flee like you're...I don't know, scared or chased by something!". She stopped a moment to gather some of her wits, thing she found tremendously hard to do; in the meantime, Five had shut his mouth and was now looking at her with wide eyes, still angry but showing something akin to understanding too.
"Why you look so full of hatred toward your father? And why does he look at you like you're just an undisciplined dog to restrain? You and your siblings all dress the same way, walk in a row in the same fucking arrangement all the time, you always stick to yourselves and no one is allowed to speak to you! It's...". Tears welled up in Marben's eyes and started running down her cheeks at once; she lowered her gaze, not finding the courage to confront Five while crying.
"You look unhappy, Five" she said finally, staring at the floor. "And I hate it, you don't deserve it. I want to be there for you, to help you through it...because I worry so much. The problem is, I don't know how to do it if you don't talk to me". Out of her line of sight, Five nodded, with a sardonic grimace on his face.
"You're right" he said after a little while, "And that's exactly why I didn't tell you anything about my life, why I wanted you to stay out from it: it's private, none of your concern and if I wanted to fix it, it wouldn't be your help I'd ask for".

Marben looked up, then, at the boy she had fallen in love with the very first time they had met. Through all her tears Five looked blurred, yet his usual good-looking self. How could she look at him and still find him so amazing after what he had just told her? And how dared he to look that composed after superficially dismissing her anguish and tears?

Violin and bow still in hand, Marben fled from her room slamming the door. On her bed, already repented, Five sagged back on the mattress, head between his own hands.
"Shit!".

A/N: ...the right answer was 'drama'. Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you...