Chapter 32.

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Today is the day, it's time to say goodbye.

I don't think I can, but I know I'll have to. It's hard enough accepting that he's leaving, but to actually watch him do it, is another story. That's why we are both in my room, sitting cross legged and playing with each others hands.

" I think I'll buy myself a dictionary," he says.

" Thought dictionaries were too nerdy for you."

" Well yeah but at least it'll remind me of you."

" You make it sound like I'm already gone." I say.

He chuckles. " Way to ruin the moment." He jokes and I offer a small smile with a shrug.

" You know this isn't goodbye right?" He mentions.

I tilt my head to the side, avoiding his eyes. When I look at him again, I see a frown form on his forehead but before I can say anything, my eyes catch Vicky standing at the doorway.

Our eyes connect and she nods at me.

I look back to Connor. " It's time to go." I pull my hands out of his.

He glances over his shoulder, to see Vicky. " Your family is here." She mentions.

He nods before looking back at me.

To not make things harder as they are starting to, I get off the bed and stand before him, holding out my hand to him which he takes after a seconds hesitation.

Standing in front of me, he tilts my chin up to meet his gaze and when I do, I see so much emotion playing in his eyes.

I decide to make the first move and close the gap, wrapping my arms around his waist and resting my head against his chest. He doesn't waste time in engulfing me in a hug. With his tight hold, I take this all in, that this is for the last time until we see each other again.

Either way, it's not gonna be the same.

I unwrap my arms from around him and peck his cheek before taking a step back, giving him space.

" Time to go." Vicky repeats.

I believe Vicky is doing this to speed things up and that it won't have to be much harder. He steps back and then leaves my room to take his bags from his room.

I turn around and face the window.

With his mom's car down there, reality kicks in and I'm holding back all emotion until after he leaves. I can't be the one stumbling block in his way to freedom and his chance to live his life, outside the centre this time.

My time will come but only later, when I am ready.

Oh will I ever be ready?

Someone knocks on my door and when I glance over my shoulder, I see him standing at my door way, his bags in hand and so much emotion playing at his features.

We stare at each other for way too long that I have to restrict myself too many times, from running to him and kissing him. Instead, I offer a small smile and he gives off a nod.

My eyes linger on him for a few seconds before I turn back around to face the window, not wanting to witness this any longer. After some time, I glance back again to see him gone and only Vicky present, who enters inside my room and closes the door behind her.

I remain glued to my place and pay close attention to what's happening outside. I feel hands squeeze lightly on my shoulder before I turn away from the window, and go on to sit on my bed.

Soon she joins me. " You know this isn't the end right?"

" His words." I point out.

She doesn't say anything.

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