The Children of the Stars

Serenity

"Let me get this straight," Ben said, once he had listened to all that Nellith had to say. "You found the Star Maps of Revan while you were the Hand of the Empress. You want to find out what happened to them, and retrieve them if you can. You then want to get a crew of Jedi, with your own ship, and go looking for them separate to what Allana's doing right now?"

"Yes." Nellith didn't hesitate, planting her hands on her hips. "I want to help. I know that most of the Jedi think I've made up for what happened during the past three years when I volunteered to rescue Jacen— but I feel like I need to do more than that. Whatever I did to help Nellith— I want to undo as much as possible."

"You don't have to do this," Jacen said, brandy-brown eyes darting from his father to Nellith, and back again. "I've never blamed you for what happened, anyone would tell you that she had you under a trance—"

"Service to evil is still evil," Nellith reminded him. "And it's not about you or anyone else. It's about me, and what I have to do. You and Jaina felt it, when you were younger. Mum always said your blood was screaming to save the stars."

"I think that was more Anakin than Jaina and I," Jacen said. "But I remember, I guess, the kind of thing you're talking about."

"Yes," Nellith enunciated carefully. "I have to do this. I'm the only one who found them in the last thousand years— no one else could tell you for sure if they're gone, or what was in the Star-Maps. It has to be me."

"Then let me go with you," Jacen begged.

"I'm not sure that's a good idea." Ben shook his head.

"I'm not exactly fragile." Jacen rolled his eyes. "And sitting here and sleeping and resting isn't going to help me. That won't make the nightmares or the last three years go away."

"That's not why—"

"I've been trying to prove that I can keep it together!" Jacen gestured wildly, furiously.

Ben placed his hand over his son's shoulder. "Son, that's exactly why I don't want you going, not yet. Facades aren't easy to keep up, and the longer you keep it up, the bigger the mess will be when you finally lose control."

Jacen lowered his arm, and stepped out of his father's grasp.

"I want to help." He echoed Nellith's words, looking straight at her.

She understood in a heartbeat, remembering how she felt after coming out of the box she'd been frozen in. Then again, when the feelings finally did crash down on her, it resulted in her getting captured.

But she couldn't deny Jacen the same chances she'd been begging for just a week ago.

"Only if Tahiri comes with us."

"Did someone say Tahiri Veila?" The blonde Jedi peeked around the corner of the doorway precipice.

"We're going on a mission to find the lost Star-Maps of Revan," Nellith explained. "We're building a crew. Do you want to come?"

Tahiri glanced at Jacen, before her eyes returned to Nellith. "We've been apart so long, it wouldn't be fair for me to say no."

Jacen smiled at her— as brilliantly as he did three year ago, before everything became awful. For a moment, that smile let Nellith pretend that everything was okay and that Jaina and Anakin were alive that Rey was here and Thea never turned to the dark side.

But all too soon, Nellith returned to the present.

She could hear her mother's voice, encouraging her with a bit of wisdom she'd learned from her hard life on Jakku, on another desert far from this one.