only you

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CHAPTER TWELVE

„Because the best gift in life, is just having someone to drink hot chocolate with

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„Because the best gift in life, is just having someone to drink hot chocolate with."
- Tessa Shaffer | from „Heaven Has No Regrets"



•••



"Today was Courtney's testimony, so I thought maybe we could talk about it.." And there she sat, in front of Tony Padilla - with a warm cup of chocolate, which she held firmly with her left hand. It's like she's holding on to this cup to protect herself from swooning. Unusual, for the usually so tough girl. „Why should I care? Especially about Courtney." Her gaze stubbornly turned to the hot chocolate.

„Lara... it's possible they're going after the girl with the "secret" because they think that person had something to do with Hannah's death." He told her in earnest, wishing she could unterstand just how true his words really were, when she only snorted in blatant disbelief. He wanted to protect her - he knew Lara pretty well. He always found it fascinating - how the girl with the beautiful chestnut-coloured hair - withdrew herself and let no one participate in her life. Until the time he saw her holding hands with a boy from school. She looked happy then.


During her testimony, Courtney finally got the courage to reveal that she is a lesbian and that she was the one who had a crush on Hannah.

„We all have things we keep hidden, sometimes keeping secrets is how you survive, because in high school, one rumor, one picture, one incident can define you, forever. When rumors spread, you can fight them or ignore them, but they never really go away. When you're the target, you do anything you can to protect yourself. Sometimes you hide. Sometimes you fight back. Anything you have to do. Because the thing is, in high school, everyone's watching you all the time. You have to be careful." Courtney defended herself, eyes hardened as they trained on the smart and ambitious litigator - Sonya Struhl.

„When we talk about secrets, did you have anything to do with the secret Hannah meant to take to the "grave"? After all, we just found out that you had a crush on Hannah." The lawyer got up from her seat and took a step towards Courtney to intimidate her. She doesn't seem to care about the feelings of the people involved.

„No, I.." she trailed off, seemingly processing her words before she allowed herself to speak them aloud. „I had nothing to do with it, and I - I don't know what it's a-about. But I think I know the name of this person..." Sensing her uneasiness, as well as Courtney's concerned brown eyes peeking up at her, Sonya Struhl brought a bright smile to her lips. „Want to tell me the name?"

Courtney opened her mouth to reply, but the words that escaped it failed to leave intentionally as her gaze went down to her hands. „L.. uhmm - ehh.."

Sonya Struhl followed her gaze with a bitter scowl. „You've got to tell me."

„Lara Audrey Lane."



„S-So you think I'm partly to blame for her...?" her voice trailed off and trembled on the word. „-death." Then she took a deep breath. „But I'm not," she told Tony, her pretty brown eyes watery and sad.

„You aren't, Lara." Their gaze locked. „And I believe you."

„- but the judge might think so," he started, then stopped and seemed to redirect his train of thought. "Zach, Clay, Jessica, Alex, or me, we want to help you. I'll prepare you in case it comes to that. But you have to tell me everything, ok? Everything." Tony sighed and biting down on his bottom lip with his row of top teeth.

Her heart raced in her chest as she stared at him with both speechless and wide-eyed, and a part of her - a part of her somewhere deep down in her chest, pulsed with pain. „I will tell you everything," she appeased him with earnest eyes. „I'll tell you everything, but only to you, Tony," she repeated, voice softening immeasurably so. „Only you." And when Tony graced her with a smile in response, Lara realized she have to speak words truer than the ones that had ever left her lips.




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